Warped Reality
by GCN-anime-dragon
Summary: Ever wonder what would happen if you woke up and you were someone else? Megumi, Aoshi, Kaoru and Misao learn the hard way, and the Kenshin-gumi has to fix it! Soon, the mystery deepens into a sinister plot. Plz RandR! Contains KK, SM, AM! Chappie 8 up!
1. In which the first switch occurs

A.N.: Um, this here is my very first fan fiction story. (So, don't flame me, pretty please. ( ) The idea I used is a little weird, and a little hard to write, so, if you get confused, please, don't hesitate to tell me. Just, before you get confused, though, here's a small note, in the cases where people are 'switched':  
  
Name1/Name2  
  
Name1= Who the person physically looks like. Name2= Who the personality belongs to, who the person actually is.  
  
Heh-heh, don't ask, you'll see what I mean soon enough.... And, if Megumi is a bit out of character, it's because I don't really like Megumi, and so I'm bending her to my will and making her as annoying or bitchy as I want her to be. Now, on with the story.  
  
Disclaimer: I am not Nobuhiro Watsuki. Duh...oh, you really thought I was??? Aw...gosh, I'm flattered.... Anyway, this means I do not own Rurouni Kenshin or any of its many characters. Though, this storyline and general idea are mine.  
  
WARPED REALITY: Chapter 1  
  
Time was being fragmented. Things were not as they should be. People weren't where...no, weren't who they should be.  
  
An evil plot was unfolding...  
  
(A.N.: *corny evil laugh* BWA-ha-ha-ha-ha...!)  
  
* * * * *  
  
Takani Megumi awoke suddenly, staring right at the ricepaper wall in front of her. The sun peeked in through the small vent in the roof and made the rice paper seem to glow. It was telling her it was morning.  
  
She sighed. Though she had gotten a full night of sleep, she reeeeally didn't want to get up and go to the clinic. Maybe...she could shirk on her duties...just this once....  
  
She closed her eyes and snuggled deeper into the futon as she rolled over. She yawned and stretched her arms out in front of her, netting her fingers as she did so, to stretch them as well.  
  
Her fingers brushed something warm and solid ahead of her. Her eyes immediately snapped open.  
  
The sleepy-eyed redhead blinked tiredly. He smiled and waved his hand slightly in front of her face. She must've been staring. (A.N.: Can you really blame her?)  
  
She couldn't breath. What the hell...?  
  
"Good morning, Kaoru koshii," Himura Kenshin sighed.  
  
'K-k-kaoru?!?!' Megumi's mind shrieked. 'What the hell is going on here? Where am I? Why'd he call me Kaoru? And most importantly, what the hell am I doing HERE?!?!'  
  
She sat up suddenly, a touch of panic setting in. As she did so, she caught a glimpse of herself on the mirror on the wall. She stared hard.  
  
Big, blue eyes stared back. Long raven hair fell across her slim form, contrasting against the unusual white of her sleeping kimono.  
  
One thought appeared in Megumi's head.  
  
'Holy Kami-sama! I'm raccoon-girl!!'  
  
"Is something wrong, Kaoru?" Kenshin asked a bit worriedly as he sat up.  
  
'He doesn't know. He doesn't realize...that I'm...err, Kaoru's different.' The sly, 'fox' area of Megumi's mind began giggling crazily. Her 'Ken-san' was totally clueless. She could mess with his head to her heart's content...all she needed was a good lie as to why she had acted so strangely when she awoke.  
  
"Um, oh Ken-sa—...err, Kenshin, I—" Megumi restrained the urge to call him 'Ken-san.' "I just had a bad dream, and it scared me a little."  
  
"Ah, well dreams are only dreams, Kaoru, that they are. They are nothing to fear."  
  
Kaoru/Megumi, Megumi-in-Kaoru's body, grinned cunningly. "I know that Kenshin."  
  
At this point, Megumi cared very little of where the actual 'Kaoru' ki, or spirit was, or why exactly she was Kaoru in the first place. See, at the moment, Megumi was only thinking of Kenshin (poor clueless Kenshin) and how he was sitting there shirtless.  
  
"Kaoru?"  
  
The Kitsune-san smiled seductively. She scootched closer to Kenshin and wrapped her arms around his neck.  
  
"My dear husband," Megumi purred into his ear. "You do always seem to make me feel better." She ran her fingers up his neck and through his head, doing her best not to giggle when her sat up strait, all tense."  
  
Kenshin shifted his gaze to look at her. "See Kaoru? After all, now it is daybreak, and there are many things to be done. He started to stand, kissing Kaoru/Megumi lightly on the forehead.  
  
Megumi, slightly annoyed at being mistakenly turned down, grabbed the cuff of Kenshin's white hakama. "Why are you going?"  
  
"The morning chores will not do themselves, that they won't, Kaoru."  
  
"But, Kenshin—"  
  
"Right now, I have my routine to attend to. But...keep that thought in mind until later tonight," Kenshin said, taking the pink/fuchsia/whatever gi off a hook by the door. With the week of one violet eye, he was gone.  
  
Megumi stared off into space for a few moments. Her first thought was that winking wasn't a very Kenshin-like thing. Her second, she spoke aloud:  
  
"Damn that laundry!"  
  
Megumi turned toward the door, causing Kaoru's hair to fluff out at the movement. Since she had nothing better to do that she could thing of, she might as well try to discover what had happened to the real Kaoru. Just as Megumi was about to leave the dojo, she heard someone calling Kaoru's name.  
  
"Kaoru? Kaoru? Hey, busu!" Myojin Yahiko ran from another of the dojo's many buildings. "You promised you'd teach me another move today!" He swung the bokken back and forth impatiently.  
  
Kaoru/Megumi blinked a few times. What the—...what now?! WHAT NOW?! She slyly tried to think of a way to get out of this....  
  
"Hello-o? Kaoru? Earth calling busu! Welcome back to Tokyo!" Yahiko jumped up and down.  
  
"Oh, Yahiko-chan...why don't you take the day off..." Kaoru/Megumi thought. "Besides, I'm in too good a mood today to deal with a brat like you." With that, she smacked Yahiko on the back of his head for good measure.  
  
He got all pointy fanged and yelled, "WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!"  
  
Megumi chuckled. It was all too easy to play the part of Kaoru. Now, time to find the real raccoon-girl. It could be fun. She wouldn't even have to tell Kaoru that she was really Kaoru/Megumi. She could somehow convince Megumi/Kaoru that she was insane. At least for a while. At least until she got sick of her 'Ken-san.'  
  
(A.N.: Ahh, Megumi, you evil little bitch....)  
  
Sure, she'd miss working at the clinic and having battles of the wits with Sano, but still.... Megumi shrugged to herself. Oh, well.  
  
Time for some fun.  
  
* * * * *  
  
AT THE SAME TIME, NEAR THE CLINIC THAT MEGUMI WOULD NORMALLY ALREADY BE AT CAME:  
  
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"  
  
A couple of startled birds flew away as what appeared to be Megumi burst though the front door of Megumi's house.  
  
Megumi herself looked totally frazzled, her black/brown hair sticking out everywhere like an afro, her gray sleeping robe all wrinkled and bunched up. Her hands were balled up into fists, and her eyes had gone all pissed- off pupil-less and slanted.  
  
But, of course it was really Kamiya Kaoru.  
  
Total panic had Kaoru babbling inanely to herself. "Demo, demo, demo...WHAT THE HELL! DAME! It can't be! I'm going crazy. AHH! Where am I? Where's Kenshin?! Why do I look like the Kitsune-san?! AHHHH, dame, dame, dame, dame...."  
  
She collapsed on the ground ranting. (A.N.: If you all couldn't have guessed Kaoru isn't one who deals well with great loads of confusion and stress.)  
  
"Dame, dame, dame, dame...."  
  
"Kitsune?"  
  
Kaoru halted her mindless rambling for a moment and listened.  
  
"Megumi, is that you?"  
  
'So, it's true,' Kaoru thought feverishly. 'People are calling me Megumi. What did I do to deserve this?' She barely took note that someone had sat down beside her, but she slowly looked up. Sagara Sanosuke had come over and was currently staring at her intently.  
  
"What's up with you?" he blinked.  
  
"Ada...it's you Sano. I'm – , I'm –" she faltered. 'Kami-sama, he'll think I'm insane!' she ridiculed herself. "Gomen nasi, Sano, but I—"  
  
"Dr. Gensai's been lookin' for you. Apparently, you didn't show up at the clinic this morning. And apparently there are a lot of patients out there." Sanosuke scratched his head. "Plus you look like you fell down a well or something anyway. What the hell happened?"  
  
Kaoru took a couple of moments to think. Deep within her, she knew she had to keep cool. The last thing she needed was everyone thinking she...err, 'Megumi' had gone crazy. Perhaps...perhaps it would be best to play along for now. Until she could find out what had happened, until she was herself again.  
  
Speaking of which...  
  
Where was Megumi, anyway?  
  
A thought occurred to Kaoru.  
  
"Um, Sano? Have you seen any of the others this morning? Like, say, Kenshi—...Ken-san, or um, Kaoru?" he twiddled her fingers nervously.  
  
"Oh, Kenshin was out doing laundry again, but as for Jou-chan, she took off early this morning.... Kenshin said that she was acting a bit odd this morning." Sanosuke turned, directly staring at Megumi/Kaoru. "Shikashi, Kitsune-san, you've dodged my question."  
  
Megumi/Kaoru blushed. 'Oh, crap!' she thought. She just wanted to make Sano stop prying, to make him shut up. It was then when she realized telling him to do so would not be a very un-Megumi like thing to do.  
  
"Oh, you nosey rooster! Why can't you just one butt-out and stay out of a woman's business?" She promptly tried (without succeeding) to fix her hair and stood up to head back into 'her' house.  
  
"Hey! Now wait just half a damn minute. I don't recall stepping over any personal boundaries. All I did was—" Sano began.  
  
Kaoru kept walking. "Not now, Rooster. I have to work."  
  
As she left, Sanosuke stood there grating his teeth. "What the hell did I do now?!"  
  
* * * * *  
  
Megumi/Kaoru went to the clinic like Megumi would have normally done. Though she was late, it wasn't as urgent as Sanosuke had made it out to be. Thing went pretty smoothly at first.  
  
Meanwhile, Kaoru/Megumi herself was looking for Kaoru. After checking out 'her' house and finding only a muttering Sanosuke, she concluded that Kaoru must've been posting as her at the clinic.  
  
Realizing this gave Megumi some seriously bad thoughts. The first: What if Kaoru wasn't Megumi and there were two versions of herself running around, and no Kaoru?  
  
The second: Worse, what if Kaoru was trying to pose as Megumi and was working at the clinic? It was no secret that Kaoru was not a competent medical worker.  
  
This severely agitated Megumi. Maybe it wasn't worth getting Kenshin if it meant endangering the lives of her patients. (A.N.: Megumi does have a heart, see??)  
  
As Megumi entered the clinic, she saw half a dozen people waiting patiently in the waiting room. None looked seriously sick or injured. Basic checkups. Even Kaoru could deal with those.  
  
Then, Kaoru/Megumi her own true voice coming from the adjacent room: "Dr. Gensai! Dr. Gensai! Could you come in here, pleeeze?!"  
  
The old man sighed gruffly from the other side of the room. "What is it NOW?"  
  
Dr. Gensai entered Megumi's workroom, an Kaoru/Megumi followed. Both sweat dropped at what Megumi/Kaoru was doing. Because, it only could have been Kaoru.  
  
She had the poor patient's entire head wrapped totally in bandages. He was making little noises of 'please-get-me-out-of-here-help!'  
  
"I don't understand! I was doing it all right, I swear!" Megumi/Kaoru leaned over, struggling with the ends of the bandages, pulling perhaps a bit too hard. "This is all your fault!" she muttered at the struggling patient.  
  
Kaoru/Megumi was getting ticked off. This little girl was going to give her a bad name! A reaction... she needed a reaction....  
  
"Geez, Megumi, I thought you were a doctor. What are you trying to do, kill the guy?" Kaoru/Megumi said slowly with an exasperated roll of her eyes.  
  
Megumi/Kaoru glared up from her work. Kaoru thought, 'Man, is it weird watching myself like this. But is it really me?'  
  
Megumi/Kaoru let go of the bandages as Dr. Gensai took over. "Hey, Kaoru, I need to talk to you," she said.  
  
Kaoru/Megumi's heart skipped a beat. "About what, might I ask?"  
  
Megumi/Kaoru was about to answer when Dr. Gensai began reprimanding her. "Seriously, Takani-san, this is not one of your better days! This should be a simple procedure, and you were even late today! I'd like to know what...blah, blah, blah...." At this point, Kaoru/Megumi decided to slip out. It was embarrassing to see herself get chewed out like that, even if it wasn't really her and Dr. Gensai only meant the criticism to be constructive.  
  
She began to head back to the dojo. Perhaps Ken-san would be done with his routine. She giggled to herself slyly. 'Maybe then I could spend some time alone with him...heh."  
  
Megumi closed her eyes in happiness. For a moment she forgot the strange reality she had been thrust into.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Creeeeeeeeek!  
  
Megumi/Kaoru slowwwwly slid the back door of the clinic shut. There was no way she could deal with this kinds of stress. She needed to find the real Megumi.  
  
"Going somewhere, Kitsune?"  
  
Kaoru turned suddenly, seeing Sanosuke standing behind her, his hands stuffed into his pockets.  
  
"Uh, is there something wrong here?" she asked sheepishly.  
  
"I. Have. Been. Sitting. In. That. Damn. Room. For. Half. A. Day. And. You. Haven't. Come. Out. ONCE!" Sano grated, waving his bandaged hand in front of her face. He pointed it at her angrily. "You know I always come here every three days to change this. Never once have I been ignored like! Somethin's up with you, and I wanna know exactly what the hell it is!"  
  
Megumi/Kaoru drew back. "G-gomen nasi, Sano. I-I'm just...not myself today," she muttered lamely.  
  
"I'll say! Take this morning for example. What was up with that? It's not like you're always Ms. Sunshine, but Kami-sama! You've got to stop...to stop...." He faltered.  
  
Kaoru felt horrible. There was a look in Sanosukes's eyes that she had never seen there before. Hurt. She had hurt him. Sanosuke was an unbelievably strong man, but Kaoru had suspected that he had feelings for Megumi. Maybe he had had enough.  
  
Even though Megumi would've probably acted the same way she had that morning, she couldn't help but be ashamed. Maybe there were things that Kaoru hadn't known about, that she had now screwed up.  
  
She burst into tears, hugging Sanosuke in the process. "Ada, Sano, I'm so sorry!"  
  
Sano had been exceedingly ticked off a few moments ago, but now he was seriously confused. This wasn't Megumi, this sudden change of emotions. It sorta reminded him more of...Jou-chan.  
  
Kaoru pulled herself off Sanosuke. "I'm...I, have...to go."  
  
"Wait! Where?"  
  
"Ada, I don't know! I just gotta fix this somehow!"  
  
A giant question mark appeared over Sano's head. "Huh?"  
  
Kaoru kept running. She thought, 'this has got to stop.... Kenshin. He'll help me. I've got to find Kenshin.  
  
...Meanwhile, right outside the Kamiya dojo, Kaoru/Megumi, Kenshin, Yahiko, Ayame, and Suzume were going on a walk. Suzume, the younger of the two of Dr. Gensai's grandchildren, was riding on top of Kenshin's shoulders, waving her arms and giggling like crazy.  
  
Kaoru/Megumi walked beside Kenshin and took his hand in hers, which emitted a loud 'Ewww' from Yahiko. Kaoru/Megumi decided not to make a comment.  
  
"Gee..., Kenshin, that looks like fun, and my feet are beginning to hurt. Do you mind if I...."  
  
Kenshin blinked rapidly a few times in succession. "Well, Kaoru, don't you think...?"  
  
"C'mon, Kenshin. I don't weigh that much!" Kaoru/Megumi laughed. That was definitely true. Kaoru, who was shorter and lighter than Kenshin in stature, and that meant she was short. (A.N.: No offense to Kenshin.)  
  
"Fine then." He handed Suzume to Yahiko, who kind of stood there like 'huh?,' and lifted Kaoru/Megumi up onto his shoulders.  
  
"Oof!" Kenshin muttered. In the back of his mind, he noted that Kaoru had never been so...touchy before. She was normally so shy and all...he sighed to himself.  
  
Kaoru/Megumi balanced herself on his shoulders, doing her best not to choke him. She grabbed a couple of handfuls of fluffy red hair to keep from falling.  
  
"Ug, Kaoru, are you alright?" Kenshin asked.  
  
"I'm fine," she squeaked. As soon as she was sure she wasn't going to fall, (Kenshin wouldn't have let her fall anyway...), she rested her shin on her hands, with her elbows on Kenshin's head.  
  
"Enjoying the view?" Kenshin joked.  
  
"Kaoru, just what the heck are you doing?" Yahiko muttered.  
  
"Oh, you be quiet, Yahiko. Sometimes you can be so immature," Kaoru/Megumi scoffed.  
  
"Hey, what'd you say?" Yahiko growled.  
  
Kaoru/Megumi began petting Kenshin's hair, toying with his thick bangs and the little fluffs that covered his ears. She was about to repeat herself when she caught sight of someone running towards them.  
  
For a split second, Megumi forgot that she was in Kaoru's body, and was a bit confused by the figure running towards them. Then, she realized that it definitely wasn't a 'Megumi.'  
  
Lines of tried tears stained this supposed Megumi's face. She seemed more than a little confused and distraught.  
  
"Ada...Kenshin! Guys! I'm so glad I found you. I need your help! I...I —" she faltered. 'What the hell....'  
  
"Megumi, you alright?" Yahiko asked, cocking his head to the side. The motion brought Megumi/Kaoru's attention over to Kenshin.  
  
"Megumi-san, what is the matt— ORO?" Kaoru/Megumi's hand down his neck and across his collarbone, which stopped Kenshin in mid-sentence.  
  
"Well, hurry up and tell us, Megumi. We don't have all day," Kaoru/Megumi purred, while staring right at her. "Since when have you come bawling to us with your problems?"  
  
Megumi/Kaoru blinked rapidly. "But...I...I...." Kaoru/Megumi chuckled slightly, returning her hand to Kenshin's hair as he stared up at her stupidly.  
  
Kaoru could have sworn she saw fox ears pop out of her own body's head. It clicked.  
  
Her eyes got all pupil-less and squashed.  
  
She pointed. "YOU!"  
  
* * * * *  
  
A tallish man with a mushroom cap shaped haircut stood just inside the opening of a cave. He was dressed in warm coats, because outside the wind was blowing and small flakes of snow were falling. The floor of the cave was cut and polished, but the walls were covered with reflective ice.  
  
"Who! It's gotten even colder," the man said, whipping the fog off his glasses. He turned around, looking toward another figure, standing in the shadows. "Even so...are you ready?"  
  
"Yes, I am," the young man said cheerfully. Even though he had to be at least twenty by now, his voice was still high-pitched and very recognizable. (A.N.: Guess who?)  
  
"I've waited along time for this...," the first man grated. "Too long. Now with this new base and technology, I'll finally have all the money I once possessed. And...I'll finally get to seek my revenge. Even if her pathetic gang of friends were to follow her, they'd never be able to find her.  
  
He chuckled evilly. "This time, that bitch will taste every ounce of my revenge!"  
  
The boy laughed. "Perhaps so. Should I be on my way now?"  
  
Takaeda Kanryu nodded. "Bring her to me. Alive. Otherwise Megumi will never know who will torture her...make her beg for mercy...," he pretended to be violently choking someone.  
  
The boy just stood there blinking. "Ummm...okay. I'll be right back." He turned toward the door, and began tapping his left foot on the floor of the cave.  
  
"Don't be too long, Tenken," Kanryu grated, slipping back out of his 'I'm-a- psycho' mode.  
  
The boy smiled even wider than normal. "Trust me. This is all too easy." He just kept right on smiling.  
  
Of course...he always did....  
  
A.N.: Ta da. There it is. I'm done. So, HOW'D YA LIKE IT???? Please review. Reviews make me happy. ((((((...(get the hint yet?)....  
  
I hope this wasn't confusing at all. Maybe that was just me being paranoid again. Heh. But anyways, I have the next few chapters written, so it won't take me long to post them. (Shikashi...reviews would make me work faster, ne?)  
  
If you would be as so kind as to add your favorite part in this chapter, or tell if I goofed up something, that would be NICE. Hint hint....  
  
When I wrote this, I fiddled with the idea of 'switching' Kenshin and Sanosuke. Yes, that may have been weird and funny, but it wouldn't have worked at all for the story I have planned, so gomen nasi. :P....But I will leave with the amusing mental image of Kenshin/Sanosuke running around like a decapitated chick screaming, "Holy shit, I'm short! Holy shit, I'm short! Holy shit, I'm short!!!!"  
  
Yeah, yeah, I know. I'll shut up now, that I will.  
  
~GCN anime dragon (^-^x)  
  
Wait... a certain annoying member of my family demand that I put a little "Japanese-English Dictionary" at the bottom here, so I will....  
  
Kami-sama: I think it means like "The Lord Almighty"  
  
Ki: The spirit thing or whatever that Kenshin can sense.  
  
Futon: The very flat, uncomfortable-looking bed-things  
  
Gi: Things like the pink thing Kenshin wears  
  
Hakama: The pants-like things like Kenshin wears.  
  
Bokken: (shinai): wooden sword that the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu uses.  
  
Gomen nasi: Apologetic...Like, I'm sorry.  
  
Shikashi: However, but...(contradictory)  
  
Ne: right?  
  
Ada: an exclamation, like 'Oh?' or 'Oh!'  
  
Koishii: Term of endearment, like 'My love...'  
  
Dame: simply put: NO  
  
Demo: (contradictory) but  
  
Jou-chan: Roughly means, 'the missy,' what Sano calls Kaoru  
  
Kitsune-san (Kitsune): Fox or Fox Lady  
  
Busu: 'Ugly,' or hag or wench...what Yahiko calls Kaoru.  
  
Maa Maa: (I think—) 'Now, now....'  
  
I don't even slightly claim to know Japanese (shut up Jacoby), so if any of this info is mussed up or incorrect (though I highly doubt it is) don't have a cow.  
  
If you think you know more useful words than me (which you probably do) I'll be HAPPY to reveive them via e-mail, reviews, etc. THANKS, Y'ALL! (no, I am not a y'all person, don't even ask why I did that...:P) 


	2. In which the unthinkable happens!

A.N.: Alright, I'm updating really quickly this time. I'm so happy. I got a review!!!(thanks KatDrama) (and your right, it is chi, but I've seen it both ways)) :) It's going to get a little weirder here, but not much... that comes in the third chapter, yes it does.  
  
Soon, I'll post a bio as well...anyway.... I had a hard time putting who the main characters are, but soon, it'll be all the main ones ^____^. And the little genre thingy, that was hard too... maybe you all could help me :| Right now, it's labled K+K, but may more to Sano+Megumi. You tell me.  
  
Dis-frickin'-claimer: Blah, blah, blah, the same shit everyone puts. I DO NOT OWN RUROUNI KENSHIN, GET IT THROUGH YOUR HEAD...! Though, the basic storyline of this fanfiction is MINE. (So, no touchy.) (  
  
WARPED REALITY: CHAPTER 2  
  
Kenshin blinked. "Oro?"  
  
Yahiko, however, was less quiet. "Alright, would somebody please tell me what the hell is going on here?" He crossed his arms and stared at the two women.  
  
Megumi/Kaoru's hands were all squished up into little fists and she looked more than a little scary as she stared up at Kaoru/Megumi.  
  
Kaoru/Megumi tried to look as innocent as possible. "Who, me?"  
  
"You sneaky little witch! What the hell do you think your doing?! CHANGE ME BACK!!!"  
  
"WHAT?" Kaoru/Megumi asked genuinely. "I haven't done anything!"  
  
"You lying wench!" Megumi/Kaoru fumed. She mover her hands back and forth, doing a really bad example of sign language to illustrate her point. Her erratic motions could be translated as 'pouring a liquid from one vile to another.' "You used one of those creepy potions or whatever to steal my body!"  
  
Yahiko rolled his eyes. "Geez, Kaoru, why would anyone want to steal your body?"  
  
Megumi/Kaoru turned veeery slowly toward him. "Yahiko Myojin, dammit! Would you just once shut up?!"  
  
Yahiko's eyes got very large and he seemed to shrink a little. Despite being exceedingly ticked off at the moment, Kaoru was inwardly happy that even when she looked like that damn Megumi, Yahiko called her Kaoru; that her personality was that recognizable under such conditions. That maybe, just maybe, even if she never returned to normal, that she could live her somewhat-normal life.  
  
Kenshin coughed quietly. "Um...Megumi-san, err...Kaoru, whoever you are, could you calmly tell this one exactly what is going on here?"  
  
"I'm Kaoru," Megumi/Kaoru said forcefully, pointing at herself. "And THAT'S Megumi. Somehow...somehow...we've been switched." Now she pointed at Kaoru/Megumi. (She had to stop herself from screaming, 'THAT'S MEGUMI ON YOUR SHOULDERS!!!!')  
  
Kenshin looked upward. "Kaoru...Megumi? Is this true?"  
  
Kaoru/Megumi just stared for a moment. She tried to laugh... 'Damn! This is embarrassing!' She thought quickly. "It seems as though you've been hitting the sake a bit too hard, Megumi-san."  
  
Megumi/Kaoru's blood boiled. That wasn't something she'd have EVER said to Megumi-san. Though, she was getting closer to telling her to do several other things. (A.N.: I wonder what...something along the lines of 'GO F#$@ YOURSELF YOU STUPID BITCH!!!'.... or something ()  
  
"Listen you!" she pointed. (A.N.: here it comes....) "I'm sick of this game! Change me back!"  
  
(A.N.: oh, what a let down....j/k)  
  
The glint in Kaoru/Megumi's eyes changed and her tone of voice lowered as well. She had dropped the act. "No. You listen to me you ignorant little twit. This was not of my doing. As a matter of fact, I wasn't aware of the situation until this morning when I woke up next to Kenshin. That's when I realized I was...you."  
  
Megumi Kaoru blinked. So it was true...and neither of them knew how. But, moreover, Kaoru got a minor case of the creeps just then.  
  
"You, woke up next to Kenshin?" Megumi/Kaoru shivered. Boy, that was a strange mental image.  
  
"Maa maa, Kaoru, you get those hentai thoughts out of your head. We didn't," Kenshin stuttered, waving his hands slightly. (Now, he had disturbing thought of a different kind.)  
  
Kaoru fumed. THAT wasn't what she'd meant.  
  
"Dammit, Kenshin!" she began, taking a step forward.  
  
Then she noticed that Kenshin's eyes were as big as dinner plates. Kaoru/Megumi had slid one of her hands down inside Kenshin's gi and was giggle out: "Maybe, maybe...."  
  
A vein popped in Kaoru's head. That was IT.  
  
She balled her hands up again until her fingernails dug into her own palms. She shut her eyes tightly. She couldn't deal with this...with this bitch, now. She may end up doing something she would regret.  
  
She spoke. "I can't...I can't deal with this now. I...I need to be alone...so I can.... I have to find a way to fix this." She turned her back on the others and the tears started again. Kenshin stared at the ground, pretending to be way-too amused with the pebbles and dirt ahead of him.  
  
"Dammit, what now?" Yahiko muttered. He was totally lost.  
  
Ayame and Suzume tugged at the sleeves of his gi. "Yahiko, what's wrong with...Auntie Kaoru?" Ayame began.  
  
"Yeah, what's wrong?" Suzume echoed.  
  
Overhearing, Megumi/Kaoru looked at them sideways. "I'm fine. I'll be better, but I need to be alone for awhile."  
  
HUGE question marks appeared over both girls' heads. Yahiko turned them around to face him. "You two don't need to worry about it. Why don't you let me take you to your grandfather's clinic now?"  
  
"Okay!"  
  
"Okay!"  
  
"Hurry back Yahiko," Kenshin said quietly, still refusing to revert his gaze from the entrancing dirt.  
  
"Right!" The three left hurriedly.  
  
Megumi/Kaoru stared at the ground. There was nothing better for her to do now then leave. She ran off, sobbing.  
  
'What now? WHAT NOW?!' she yelled at herself mentally. She had been positive everything was Megumi's fault. How could she turn back into just Kaoru now?  
  
Suddenly, she tripped and fell on her face with a squeak. She turned around and saw a boy standing in the alleyway. Where had he come from...?  
  
"There you are, Megumi-dono," the boy grinned.  
  
"Would you watch were your going?!" Kaoru wailed, already confused, tired, ticked off, and now her kimono was dirty to-boot.  
  
He just kept smiling. Without breaking that creepy grin, she turned his gaze to the side alley, where heavy footsteps and breathing was coming from.  
  
"Be quiet now. Someone's coming." He closed his eyes and giggled. "Hee-hee- hee-hee...."  
  
* * * * *  
  
Kenshin stood very still, feeling really stupid of the fact that Kaoru/Megumi was still seated firmly on his shoulders. "Megumi-san......"  
  
She stiffened slightly as he grabbed her wandering hand firmly. "Uh!" He shifted slightly; just enough to make her promptly fall on her butt.  
  
"Hey! That wasn't very nice!" she said as the startled puff of dust settled.  
  
Kenshin looked at her. He looked sad...no, more disappointed. "What you have done to Kaoru-anata was way over the line, Megumi-san. You have always teased and bothered her, even flirting with me to do so. But, you don't seem to notice how much it hurts her sometimes. You don't seem to care. You should have told us...ME, about this 'switched' predicament....I almost...."  
  
"But Kenshin, you've never..." Kaoru/Megumi couldn't help but interrupt. She stopped herself from saying 'You've never told me to stop before,' but that made her sound even shallower, even to her.  
  
"Don't you realize what you could have made me do?!" Kenshin demanded. "With your little antics, you could have made me betray my wife.... My Koishii....!"  
  
Kaoru/Megumi turned a shade paler. She realized that she had gone too far this time. "K-ken-san...I...—"  
  
"And will you please cut out the 'Ken-san' crap?! (A.N.: Whooo! Go Kenshin! Hee-hee) Most of the time I let it go, but right now, I'm really not in the mood."  
  
Kaoru/Megumi shut her mouth quickly. She had nothing more to say.  
  
"Kenshin! Hey!"  
  
The two turned their heads toward the sound of a familiar voice, but Kaoru/Megumi decided not to even pick herself off the ground. She felt too low.  
  
Sanosuke came to a halt in front of Kenshin, once again making the ex- rurouni feel short. "Kenshin! And...Kaoru?" He looked confused. "What's wrong?"  
  
"I really don't want to spend a lot of time explaining this to you Sano, because this one doesn't fully understand it himself. Though, it appears that somehow Kaoru and Megumi have switched places...err, bodies, to be exact. See, that's actually Megumi-san." He pointed.  
  
"HUH?!" Sanosuke said intelligibly. "Say what?"  
  
"Kaoru looks like Megumi-san and vice versa."  
  
"Ada, I get it." Kenshin could see the wheels turning in Sano's head. Something clicked, and Sano's eyes got a little wider. "So...so that was actually Jou-chan back and the clinic, and...AW MAN! I'm the biggest ass in the world!"  
  
"Sano?" Kenshin asked.  
  
"Gee, Kenshin, do you know where Jou-chan went?? I'm afraid I may have been a little harsh this morning, and I need to talk to her."  
  
Kenshin pointed in the general direction, and Sanosuke took off at lightning speed. "Hey, Sano wait—!"  
  
"No you don't, Kenshin! You're waitin' for me!" Kenshin and Kaoru/Megumi both spun around, finding Yahiko running from the direction of the clinic.  
  
Kaoru/Megumi stood up slowly as Yahiko closed the distance. What a mess she had caused. Even if she hadn't actually caused the switch, she realized that she should have told Kenshin and the others right of.  
  
She sighed. 'Here I am, feeling sorry for myself again....'  
  
Yahiko stumbled to a stopping point beside Kaoru/Megumi. "What now, you two?" he asked.  
  
"I...suppose we need to find out how to undo the 'switch.' Though, this one really doesn't know how, that he does not," Kenshin grumbled. "First, though, we need to find Kaoru again, and now Sanosu—" He was cut short by a scream. And get this: It didn't sound like a girl's scream.  
  
They stood still for about two seconds.  
  
"What was that?" Yahiko squeaked.  
  
"Sanosuke!" Kaoru/Megumi whispered hauntingly.  
  
"Shit," Kenshin growled forcefully, and the three took off at the next moment. They could see Sano's and Megumi/Kaoru's very faint footprints in the soft soil of the alleyways.  
  
After only traveling a few blocks, the three members of the Kenshin-gumi came to where the footprints had stopped suddenly, and a much rather...different path took their place.  
  
Kaoru hadn't run very far.  
  
The sight was certainly an eyeful.  
  
The normal dust on from the road was totally blown away, leaving only the packed, hard dirt. Three meters in front of where the trio stopped began the new set of tracks, which were truly grooves cut into the ground, about six inches wide, and a couple deep, although it varied in places. The tracks continued into the distance, all the way to the horizon.  
  
However, most importantly and most noticeable there was Sanosuke. He was lying sprawled, crumpled next to one of the nearby buildings. He was bleeding from the mouth, nose, and ears, and from the strait cuts across his back and left ankle.  
  
He was lying, unmoving, in a growing pool of his own blood....  
  
A.N.: Ha ha ha, I'm so mean...how's that for a cliffhanger?!  
  
I know, I know, I'm so evil.... But I need encouragement for my poor delicate ego. *eyes water as crickets chirp* Whatever. But give me reviews, or I'll...I'll... I don't know. But I won't post the next chapter until I get some responses (yes it is already typed up).  
  
Trust me, the next chappie is priceless. Think: People who live in Kyoto. 


	3. In which it gets even weirder, MA!

A.N.: Okay, people, I'm getting a little discouraged right about now. I was kinda having high hopes for the reviews by now, but, I will update, so you people who've so kind as to read/review, won't kill me...It has been two weeks almost. I love ya all!  
  
OOOOOOkay, I'll stop with the wishy-washy shit. I'm really not THAT sensitive. But my forgoing ego is a bit touchy.... just kidding!!  
  
Um, I know it's probably really mean to go on and leave you hanging after the last chapter, so gomen nasi...but, this part is kinda important and such, and it needs to be told before I conclude that cliffhanger.... This chapter is also good for some amusing mental images, and (I hope) some good laughs. Yeh, you guessed right, it's gonna get weirder....  
  
DISCLAIMER: *see first two chapters* (I.E. I don't own Rurouni Kenshin, but this story is my idea, so no touchy()  
  
WARPED REALITY: CHAPTER 3  
  
(in which we go to KYOTO)  
  
It was a sunny day. So calm. So peaceful. Tiny puffs of white clouds danced across the otherwise clear sky. The green and gold grasses swayed gently in the warm noontime breeze.  
  
'What a lousy day to be stuck inside,' Makimachi Misao thought grimly. At this time, she was working at the beef-pot restaurant near the Aoiya. Misao hated it. Aprons were so not her type of thing.  
  
"Oh, Misao, could you get some more water for the kitchen?" Omasu asked. Behind her stood the tall Ochika, her hair tied up in a bun like Omasu's.  
  
Misao crossed her arms. "Aw, but so I have to? I'm already waiting on six tables as it is, and was only taking a brief moment to rest before I went and worked my ass off more."  
  
"Seven tables," Ochika corrected, checking the orders.  
  
'Grrrrrr.' "Whatever, you get my point," Misao grumbled, closing her eyes again. Of course, she had just been mentally complaining about being stuck inside, but she leaned against the wall. It was more work. 'Let someone else do it,' she thought.  
  
Just then Misao had a disturbing thought. She was starting to act like her Shinomori Aoshi-sama, always willingly, (or being forced to) stay indoors, all day in and day out.  
  
"Eep!" Misao jumped a little at the thought. Sure, she loved Aoshi-sama to pieces, but that didn't mean she wanted to be him.  
  
"Misao-chan? The water?" Omasu prodded.  
  
"I'M GOING!" Misao said quickly. She snatched up the bucket and dashed out the door in a puff of dust.  
  
"Ada...whatever," Omasu sweat dropped, sighed, and went back to work.  
  
Misao walked quickly to the well, reeling down the bucket slowly. A few birds sang. The wind ruffled Misao's hair slightly, causing her long braid to fall over her shoulder.  
  
'Aa,' Misao tilted her head back and closed her eyes in a brief relaxing moment of peacefulness.  
  
Before she had a chance to open her eyes, she already knew something was different. She no longer could hear the birds, or feel the wind and sun on her skin.  
  
"What the—" she opened her eyes.  
  
She was staring at a wall.  
  
"Huh? How did I..." she started aloud. She recognized the voice, but not as her own. 'Huh? Man, that is so totally not cool....'  
  
Misao shifted her gaze. Somehow she had changed clothes, from her normal ninja outfit and apron to a light gray gi and pants. Come to think of it, she had changed skin too.  
  
Misao stood up. "What in Kami-sama is going on? WHY am I in the Sins Temple? And why do I...why do I sound....?"  
  
She wandered back a few feet, making her way to the back of the dim, scarcely decorated room. There were several glass vases lined up against the wall before her. Misao managed to catch a glimpse of herself in one of them.  
  
"HOLY SHIT!!"  
  
It had happened again. (A.N.: Bet you'd never have guessed, ne?)  
  
"HOLY SHIT!!"  
  
Misao took several steps backward, running into the wall. 'That's it...I'm just dreaming...WAKE UP MISAO!' She pulled her own hand back and smacked herself as hard as she could across 'her' face.  
  
"ADA! Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow...." She instantly wished she hadn't done that as a small line of blood trickled out of 'her' nose.  
  
"Oh, dear Kami-sama, this isn't a dream. This is real...this is real...and I'm hurt...ow, ow, ow, ow...." Misao backed into the wall again, now leaning against it. "Now what am I gonna do?" she muttered.  
  
Usually in times when she was in such an annoying, confusing mess, she would run to Aoshi-sama for help or support. But, that was kinda hard to do when she WAS him....  
  
Misao slumped against the wall further, until 'her' bangs cover 'her' eyes. 'Okay, calm, ...calm, breath...breath, breath....There has to be a reasonable explanation for this....'  
  
Another thought crept into Misao's mind. If she was...here as Aoshi-sama, then what happened to the 'her' at the restaurant? Were there two 'Misaos' running around? And where was Aoshi? (A.N.: Guess.)  
  
"Man, that's a scary thought." She muttered. She decided she had to check it out. Little did she truly realize, that there was something much more scary than another 'Misao' running around.  
  
CRASH! (A.N.: and other sounds of commotion)  
  
"What the hell?! What the hell?! What the—" Aoshi/Misao (A.N.: Oh, great. Now I gotta do that blah/blah thing again....sigh.) caught sight of a Misao- looking figure dashing back inside the restaurant, tossing aside a water bucket.  
  
"Uh-oh," Misao muttered, once again startled by the change in her voice. Was that....?  
  
Inside the restaurant, the said Misao-figure ran past a startled Omasu, and tripped over Ochika.  
  
"Hey? Misao-chan?" Omasu asked.  
  
"What happened to you out there?" Ochika demanded, trying to recover and not loose her balance. "Misao-chan?"  
  
"M-Misao-chan? Misao? MISAO?!?!" the figure yelled. "AHHHHHHHH!"  
  
The figure got back on her feet and began running around like an lunatic, turning over carts and small tables, causing pots and dishes to come clattering to floor. This Misao picked up a hotplate and began repeatedly beaming herself upside the head with it.  
  
"OW!" Bong! "OW!" Bong! "OW!"  
  
"MISAO-CHAN!" Ochika grabbed the Misao's flailing wrist, keeping her from hitting herself again. The hotplate flew to the other side of the room with a crash.  
  
"Misao! Misao calm down!" Omasu commanded, trying to hold the said Misao down. "What's wrong?!"  
  
"I-I-I-I-I-I-I," she stammered.  
  
At this point, Aoshi/Misao had made it to the door and poked his/her head in. What an unusual sight!  
  
'Is that...me?' Aoshi/Misao wondered. 'Am I really such a nut?...Nah.'  
  
After she thought that, the supposed Misao began staring hard at Aoshi/Misao. "Demo...demo...demo..." 'She' closed her eyes briefly and began bapping herself on her head again, this time using the heels of her hands.  
  
'Wait,' Aoshi/Misao stood frozen.  
  
The Misao on the ground stopped smacking herself willingly, to the relief of the quickly-closing-in Omasu and Ochika. This Misao's mouth worked up and down, up and down, until a small squeak came out: "A-A-Aoshi?"  
  
Aoshi/Misao just stared into space for a while until she realized that the Misao was talking to 'her.' "Uh, uh, uh, me?"  
  
"OOOhhhhhhhhh...." Came the moaning replay.  
  
An interesting thought occurred to Misao, for the second time, but in greater detail. Wouldn't it be funny if that 'Misao' was actually Aoshi? That would certainly explain why the 'Misao' was acting so weird and crazy. Aoshi, being used to a calm, uneventful (to normal people, boring,) life of tea and meditation...suddenly becoming someone else, a GIRL none-the-less.... That would be downright crazy.  
  
Aoshi/Misao was now 99% sure that this figure was technically Misao/Aoshi. So, she decided to do a little test.  
  
"Misao-chan, would you come with me for a moment, please? There's something I'd like to ask you," Aoshi/Misao said, trying to sound like a genuine Aoshi.  
  
"Umm...uhh...okay." The other Misao slowly picked herself up off the floor, staggered a little, and VERY slowly made her way out the door with Aoshi/Misao. Way slowly.  
  
As we go into the mind of Misao/Aoshi, (because, DUH, that's who it was,) we experience the truest of confusions. 'I'm walking with ME. That's ME. Me, me, me, me, me, me....'  
  
Aoshi/Misao grabbed Misao/Aoshi by 'her' wrists, should she try to beat herself to a pulp again. She noticed that the short little Misao/Aoshi had a small trickle of blood running down her forehead and several bruises were beginning to appear above her left eye.  
  
"Aoshi...,"Aoshi/Misao whispered, dropping to her knees to look 'Misao' in the face. Still 'he' was taller than 'her.'  
  
Misao/Aoshi's eyes got all big and 'she' opened 'her' mouth involuntarily. But before 'she' could respond, Aoshi/Misao demanded, "Would you KINDLY stop trying to beat the crap out of MY body?!?!"  
  
"Your...my...your body?! Misao! Oh, thank Kami-sama, I AM AOSHI! Aoshi, Aoshi, Aoshi...," he repeated joyfully. And kept repeating.  
  
Aoshi/Misao mentally rolled her eyes. On the outside, Aoshi seemed so absolutely in control, but when thrown into a crisis, he was a bigger wreck than her.  
  
And that's saying a lot.  
  
"Misao?" Misao/Aoshi asked.  
  
Aoshi/Misao shook herself out of thought. "Hai?"  
  
"What happened? Why am I you...a GIRL?"  
  
Now Aoshi/Misao truly rolled her eyes. "I-I don't know. But, I'm trying to be calm here, and figure this out. And with you, Aoshi of all people, ranting and raving like a decapitated chicken, I can't keep concentrated at all!"  
  
Misao/Aoshi blushed. "Your right. I was acting like a child. My apologies." He set Misao's face into that always present, oh-so-familiar, stoic Aoshi stare.  
  
'I'll be calm. I'll be strong. For her,' he thought.  
  
Inwardly, Aoshi/Misao grated 'her' teeth and used all her willpower not to smack that look of her own face.  
  
"Grrrrrr," she grumbled, standing back up. Misao/Aoshi continued to stare into space.  
  
"Any ideas?" he asked monotone.  
  
"Dame. Nope. But we need help, that's for sure."  
  
"Yeah, right. Oh, sure...it's not that simple. It's not like: 'Oh, Master Okina, would you please come and call that magical Tokyo doctor and have her extract myself from Aoshi-sama and then put him back together to?' He'd lock us in the looney bin! No baka!"  
  
Aoshi/Misao couldn't help but notice the note of sarcasm of the '-sama' part. "Your right, your right. Shikashi... maybe that Megumi-san would be able to help. And...maybe even Himura would be helpful. He's seen a lot of stuff."  
  
"Oh, great. You want to run to Tokyo, and ask the Battousai, 'oh please help me extract myself from—"  
  
"Dammit, Aoshi! I'm trying to cover our options here! Your method of trying to beat yourself out of my head wasn't exactly working either!!"  
  
Misao/Aoshi shrunk. "It might be just you in there, but, I think I look a little scary when I'm angry."  
  
"Oh brother...." Aoshi/Misao sweat dropped. "Grrrrrr." She picked up Misao/Aoshi by the back of her ninja outfit, grabbing right above her pink obi. "That's it. We're going. Like it'd be any less embarrassing in Tokyo. I, for one, am not staying here like this." She lifted Misao/Aoshi and walked off, carrying 'her' over 'her' shoulder.  
  
Misao/Aoshi didn't struggle, but complained endlessly. "Ada, this is GREAT. Battousai and his baka rooster-headed friend will get a total kick out of this."  
  
Aoshi/Misao, chucked slightly (a strange sound coming out of 'Aoshi')and gave Misao/Aoshi a good shake. "Why do you insist on calling Himura that? He's no longer Hitokiri Battousai; only a goofy, lovable, oro-ing, mop- headed rurouni."  
  
"Yeah, yeah, and I'm a giggly saint. I don't give a rat's ass...."  
  
And so it continued. Misao smiled. Even when thrown into some fresh hell, she still enjoyed spending time with her Aoshi-sama.  
  
Slowly, they made their way toward the train station....  
  
A.N.: EEEEK. I don't really like the ending sentence part to this chapter, but, I was having a brain fart that day. Hee-hee.  
  
I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, that I do. Soon, I'll get the next chapter up, and that will conclude that damned cliffhanger. So, have patience. Patience is a virtue. (I know, I don't have patience either...)  
  
Err, while I was writing this, I had several disturbing thoughts about the guy/gal switch. For your sanity, I will not list them. I'll just let your own mind do that. Shikashi, there is one thing I would like to mention.... Okay...err, what if Aoshi and Misao were switched and they...you know...*cough* ...did things. Just let your little hentai minds work. *It clicks in the reader's head* There you go.......(@o@x) Ororooooo....  
  
For the next chapter, It's not going to be quite as silly anymore. Oh sure, it'll have humorous moments, but they'll become rarer and rarer as the 'drama' part comes in to play. ---And Reviews. Reviews are GOOOD. Write them. Please. ^__^. I enjoy them. I need them.... yeah, yeah, that's enough.... sayonara!!!!  
  
OH! I almost forgot. I was thinking of doing an Inu Yasha or Yu Yu Hakusho fic. WHADDYA THINK???  
  
Until later  
  
~GCN anime dragon (^-^x) 


	4. In which a theory is made

A.N.: Well, for once I don't have much to say, but THANK YA! to all my great reviewers. Ya'll are too kind. great big smile. I figured I outta update, sense it's been a little while. Now, I have the 5th and 6th chapters all written out on paper...but between the final weeks of school and work...and now I've taken an Inu Yasha fic upon myself...well, it may be a couple of weeks between updates sometimes. Gomen nasi....   
  
So now, lets get on with the story, shan't we??  
  
DISCLAIMER: Rurouni Kenshin is NOT mine. There ya go, simply stated.  
  
Warped Reality: Chapter 4  
  
For a few seconds, Kenshin, Yahiko, and Kaoru/Megumi stood frozen speechless in shock, staring into space.  
  
A low moan from Sanosuke jerked them back. Yahiko immediately ran to his side, with Kaoru/Megumi close behind. Kenshin shifted his really-pissed- off/worried gaze, but stood fixated to the spot.  
  
"Sano! Sano! Are you alright?" Yahiko babbled.  
  
"Sanosuke!" Kaoru/Megumi kneeled beside Sano and gently rolled him over. "Can you hear me? Can you move at all?"  
  
Sano's face held a look that was somewhere between rage and pain. "I'm fine, dammit! I'm fine! Get your hands off me!" He shook his arm, and then added as an afterthought, "Ouch...."  
  
"Are you sure you're alright? You looked kinda...dead." Yahiko kneeled down on the opposite side of Kaoru/Megumi.  
  
Sano propped himself up on his elbow. Coughing, a small drip of blood escaped the corner of his mouth. "I...I just got the wind knocked outta me...that's all. It's a little hard to breath now, though."  
  
"You'll recover," Kaoru/Megumi said quickly, examining Sano's painful looking ankle. The wound wasn't deep...he should be able to walk on that.  
  
"More, importantly Sano, is what happened? Sand, did you catch up with Kaoru?" Yahiko sounded worried.  
  
Sano stared into space above Yahiko's shoulder. "That's just it! I know WHAT happened, but not WHY. That kid...that annoying little bastard came out of the alley." (Here, Kaoru/Megumi, Yahiko and Kenshin turned to look.) "He said he was looking for 'Megumi-san' but he was going after Kaoru...that's who that was, right? When I tried to stop him...he...he took off."  
  
Sano clenched his teeth, holding back tears. "I couldn't stop him...I couldn't see him...DAMN! The—the next thing I knew, I couldn't breath. I—I backed out. Dammit, he took her!" He slammed his fists into the ground, creating s few cracks in it, and continued to mentally blame himself.  
  
"Who...who was it? What kid?" Yahiko whispered. He didn't know why he was whispering, but he was.  
  
"The Shukuchi," Kenshin growled.  
  
"The what?" Kaoru/Megumi asked.  
  
"Seta Soujirou, the Tenken," Kenshin explained. He himself didn't understand it, not at all. Soujirou was... he had become a rurouni, after leaving his mentor, and insane overlord, Makoto Shishio. He shouldn't have...what could he possibly want with Megumi? For the love of Kami-sama, he didn't even KNOW her!  
  
"Only the Tenken could've created those tracks," Kenshin muttered to no one in particular, gazing hatefully over at the ditches.  
  
Yahiko blinked excitedly. 'Seta Soujirou...he was one of the Juppongatana...one of Makoto Shishio's highest men. Why was he here now, attacking...us!" he fumed silently.  
  
Sano tried to sit up, got dizzy, but he fought the urge to lie down. Now wasn't the time for that. They had to find Megumi/Kaoru, for Kenshin's sake. Sano wasn't positive, but he thought he saw Kenshin's eyes flicker, just once. That wasn't a good sign.  
  
Kaoru/Megumi stared at the ground, but was really looking through it. Just as Sano blamed himself, she blamed herself.  
  
Kenshin, without another word, began following the trail left by Soujirou. He was positive that someone else had hired the boy. Soujirou himself would have no reason, no motive to hurt Megumi-san, or Kaoru, who he really kidnapped.  
  
"Kaoru..." Kenshin whispered.  
  
"Hey Kenshin!" Yahiko yelled, running to catch up. "You're not going anywhere without us!" Kaoru/Megumi traveled slowly, ghostly behind him. As soon as Sanosuke reached his feet, he also followed, ignoring his many aching wounds.  
  
"We'll get her back, Kenshin," Sano did his best to comfort, wiping the blood of his face. He frowned disdainfully; his entire jacket was smudged and stained with blood and dirt.  
  
"I know that Sano, that I do." He kept his voice low, quiet, so as not to betray the growing anger, hurt, and now fear deep within his heart. In there, he hated himself more than Soujirou, in the ultimate of blaming one's self. Meanwhile, he was attempting to formulate a plan within his head. If...when he found Kaoru, her kidnapper...and her kidnapper's master, he wasn't sure what he would do.  
  
But he knew he would find them, by following these tracks as far as he could. Maybe by then, he would have decided....  
  
The trail kept going, and going, and going. And so they walked, and walked and walked. And walked....BLAH! (A.N.: I HATE writing 'the journey' parts of stories. So, here's the point: They walked. And somehow, the tracks lead them past the Tokyo Train Station. Of course... :P)  
  
Sano limped at first, but soon most of the pain subsided. Or, maybe he just wasn't paying attention to it anymore.  
  
Yahiko, whom Megumi was certain would pass out from walking all night and begin complaining, strode straight ahead, never falling back from Kenshin's side. Kaoru/Megumi was rather impressed, because she herself was beyond tired.  
  
She took a second to breath, resting her hands on her knees and slowly inhaling. Sano and Yahiko kept trudging on ahead, but Kenshin paused, swiveling around in place without hesitation.  
  
"Megumi-san. WHY are you stopping?" he asked calmly. On the outside, he seemed calm, placid, in control. But there was this kind of cloud, an aura that surrounded him, revealing that he was on the edge, ready at a moment's notice to draw his sakabatou and attack. You could tell by the way he stood, by the way he walked, by the way his left hand was never far from his sword.  
  
"I'm sorry to seem so insistent, Megumi-san, but we have absolutely NO time to waste." Kenshin turned stiffly, gaze falling down to the tracks. They had shrunk to only about an inch deep, half that wide. At times, they were damned near impossible to see. Any interference at all, and them may disappear.  
  
"Ken-san," Kaoru/Megumi murmured.  
  
Kenshin turned back around to face her. A steady stream of harsh words were ready to come pouring out, but Kenshin didn't have the heart to unleash them. Though his eyes were all narrowed and Hitokiri-looking, he couldn't bring himself to flat-out absolutely blame Megumi. That was impossible to do, since he blamed himself.  
  
He sighed instead. "Megumi-san...."  
  
There was a sharp tug on Kenshin's ponytail, and he felt himself being drug backwards. "Oroooo?"  
  
"C'mon, Kenshin," Sanosuke grumbled. "No baka, we need to keep creating motion instead of standing here like a bunch of ninnies. Right, Yahiko?"  
  
"Yeah! We've got to catch that Juppongatana boy and get Kaoru back, remember?" Yahiko added.  
  
Kenshin, still being drug by his hair, crossed his arms and laughed coldly, "Ada, Yahiko, I assure you, no one remembers that better than this one. We will need----OOORRRROOOOOO?!"  
  
"HEY!" Sanosuke, who was paying diddley squat attention to where he was going, tripped and fell flat on his face, dragging Kenshin with him. Yahiko, who was also not paying attention, tripped over Kenshin's sprawled form and rolled a few feet.  
  
Kaoru/Megumi ran to catch up. "Are you alright?"  
  
"Ugh...Sano...." Kenshin grumbled, lying on the hard dirt with his eyes closed.  
  
"That was embarrassing," Yahiko muttered, brushing the rocks and dust out of his hair.  
  
"I'LL say it was," a voice said, sounding greatly amused. Sano looked up into the shadow above him and made out the image of a tall man carrying a small girl.  
  
The one who had spoken was the girl. Though her voice sounded more serious...lower then Sanosuke remembered.  
  
"Misao-chan?" he mused.  
  
The small girl LEPT out of the man's grasp, flipped over and landed right on Sano's chest, which knocked the wind out of him, again. She pushed her nose up into his face.  
  
"What did you say?! Misao-chan?! Misao? Chan? Are you people really that ignorant?" Aoshi/Misao yelled.  
  
The man, who appeared to be Aoshi, giggled. "Ada, Aoshi-sama, did you REALLY expect them to know?" He leaned down, and looked at poor, flattened Kenshin. "Himura! Glad to see you're as oro-y as usual!"  
  
''Himura', coming from Shinomori Aoshi? Misao's not... Misao?' Kaoru/Megumi was trying to add things up in her head. 'And Aoshi is...SMILING?! And LAUGHING??"  
  
"Something's wrong here," she said aloud.  
  
"No, really? Go figure! I'm glad someone here has a brain! I'll tell you, I've never---"  
  
Aoshi/Misao promptly picked up Misao/Aoshi as Sano lay on the ground all spiral-eyed.  
  
"Pardon him. He's just a little touchy," Aoshi/Misao laughed.  
  
"Misao-chan, PUT ME DOWN!"  
  
"Will you cut it with the '-chan'? I'm taller than you now, and you know it." Aoshi/Misao set 'him' down on the roadway. 'She turned 'her' gaze to Kenshin, still lying prone on the ground. "So, Himura, is everything normal with you? I told ya I'd come to visit, even if it is on such short notice."  
  
"Aoshi?" Kenshin asked, bewildered. "Are you alright?"  
  
"I'm fine, Battousai, "Misao/Aoshi snorted.  
  
Kenshin got all big eyed. "ORO?"  
  
Aoshi/Misao stopped grinning for a moment. "Gomen nasi, it's been a very long trip, and he's not so thrilled with this whole 'switch' thing, so...."  
  
"'Switch' thing?" Kaoru/Megumi echoed.  
  
"Oh, goody, I wasn't sure how to tell you, but since you asked, great!" Aoshi/Misao clapper her hands together. "You see, we're in need of your assistance. Perhaps one of your doctor friends could help us. As Aoshi before put it:  
  
'Oh, please help me extract myself from Aoshi-sama and put him back  
together from me as well.'  
  
"Wait," Kenshin pointed one hand up in the air at 'her', even though he was till flat on his back. "You mean, you are telling this one that you are Misao inside Aoshi, and that Aoshi is Misao?"  
  
Aoshi/Misao shrugged. "Yeah, that's about it. I know it's hard to believe, but...."  
  
"We really aren't crazy," Misao/Aoshi finished.  
  
"Whoa, boy." Kenshin sat up quickly as Sano made it to his feet, glaring at Misao/Aoshi, and Yahiko just stood up.  
  
"Iai, sadly, it's not hard to believe at all. Misao...Aoshi. Both of you. You see, the sad part is, is that we know exactly what you are talking about, all too well," Kaoru/Megumi said, looking at the dirt.  
  
"Nani?" Misao/Aoshi choked.  
  
"Hai, indeed we do," Kenshin dusted off his back. "You may think it odd that we aren't calling you insane right now, but the truth is, we are facing the same predicament."  
  
"But, Himura, you seem normal enough,"  
  
"It's not me...it was Kaoru Koishii, and Megumi-san," he pointed. "Here, my friends, is Megumi."  
  
Now, Misao/Aoshi let out an even bigger, "NANI?"  
  
'Whoa, this is easier than I thought....' Aoshi/Misao thought. 'But...something bothers me. They know what we're talking about, but....'  
  
"Then, why are they still switched?" she blurted.  
  
Misao/Aoshi spoke before any of them could answer. "Obviously, they don't know how to undo the switch. Perhaps, you should be focusing on other questions, Misao, like 'Sanosuke, why are you covered in blood?'"  
  
Misao felt incomparably stupid. Poor Sano. She realized that she should have noticed that something was wrong.  
  
"G-gomen nasi," she stammered, looking down, (which seemed like an odd reaction for an 'Aoshi.')  
  
"Misao-chan," Kenshin said gently. "This one understands, that you did not notice, considering that your life is a little confused right now. But, it is indeed true that we are in a time of crisis. Kaoru is...was..." he stuttered, his eyes flashing for a moment.  
  
"Kaoru was taken AGAIN!" Yahiko blurted. "And we're on a mission to find her!"  
  
Kenshin sighed, "Hai, Yahiko." He looked at Aoshi/Misao. "But this time it was a case of mistaken identity. There were truly after Megumi-san."  
  
Aoshi/Misao got these great big eyes as Misao/Aoshi nodded curtly.  
  
"So...?" Aoshi/Misao began.  
  
"This one has a theory. That is all." Kenshin waved his hand. "But, it is best that we discuss these matters in private."  
  
Aoshi/Misao giggled. "Ada, Himura, you seem so serious!"  
  
---A quick glare from Kenshin shut her up---  
  
They were able to get a room in the smaller town next to the Fuji Mountains. (A.N.: Okay, don't stake me... I don't know any nearby towns, and I don't now the Mt. Range's name. suppose a little research might help. But, in other words, they're in the mountain range by a certain psycho's base....hint, hint.)  
  
The hostess bowed, rose from her knees and left with the group's dishes. Kenshin got up and slid the door shut as smoothly as possible. "Now, we need to clarify a few things...."  
  
"Yeah," Sano muttered. "Like...why are we all sharing the same room? Eh, Kitsune-san?" Sano batted his eyelashes as he scooted closer to Kaoru/Megumi, getting in her face.  
  
"Get off it, you baka Rooster head!!!" Kaoru/Megumi, slapping him upside the face, "Hentaiiiiiiiiiii!"  
  
Sano fell backwards, landing hard on his elbows. "NANI? Nothing hot for poor little me from this corner? Okay...let's see..." he turned his gaze to Misao/Aoshi, and gave a pure hentai grin.  
  
"Sagara, if that puny rooster brain of yours even thinks of saying anything, I will personally grant you with the gift of what it feels like to have two kodachi stuck up your ass," Misao/Aoshi said coldly, crossing his arms.  
  
Aoshi/Misao giggled. Sano blinked, getting one of those tiny-eyed, no nosed, smiley expressions.  
  
"Shutting up," Sano stuttered, bowing.  
  
Kenshin kicked off his sandals, came over and kicked Sano as hard as he could in the ass. Sano flipped end-over-end into Misao/Aoshi.  
  
"I SAID...!!!"Misao/Aoshi began.  
  
"Aoshi-san, calm down. Sano...just grow up," Kenshin muttered. "We all have something to discuss."  
  
"Dah-dah-dah-dah-dah...." Sano was all swirly-eyed.  
  
Yahiko got off the floor and came up behind him, giving him a good shake. Still shaking Sano, he asked, "So, Kenshin, what now? Did you sense anything?"  
  
Kenshin sat down and drew little circles in the wood floor. "Hai...but it is only a theory."  
  
"Tell us, Battousai," Misao/Aoshi prodded.  
  
"Well, as you know, Kaoru, appearing to be Megumi-san was kidnapped. For now, I'm having trouble figuring out why."  
  
"Why?" Sano asked, rubbing his cheek.  
  
"Because, Seta Soujirou, the culprit, wouldn't have any reason to attack Megumi. He would have had to been hired to do so."  
  
"Shukuchi?" Misao/Aoshi asked. Kenshin nodded; he wasn't surprise that a fighter as experienced as Aoshi would have heard of the boy Tenken.  
  
"But who hired him?" Yahiko asked.  
  
"There, this one is at a total loss, that I am." Kenshin turned to Kaoru/Megumi. "Megumi-san, is there anyone, ANYONE out there that would hate you so much as to hire Soujirou the Tenken after you?"  
  
"Iai, none that I can think of."  
  
"Now, there's a surprise," Sano coughed jokingly.  
  
"Well, think harder," Kenshin said, ignoring Sano. "But, next and more importantly, is my theory. This one believes that the personality-switches are connected to Kaoru's disappearance."  
  
"Nani? Why the heck do you think that?" Yahiko demanded.  
  
It's just a feeling, that it is. I first noticed the disturbance when I woke up yesterday. I noticed that Kaoru's...Megumi's chi was different, but the feeling soon melted away, and so I thought nothing of it. But then, when the real Kaoru showed up, both chi's were messed up.  
  
"That makes sense, but what does that have to do with Kaoru's disappearance?" Aoshi/Misao asked.  
  
"Not much, I'm afraid. But then, when this one found you two, he felt the same disturbance. But the bigger thing is...that the longer we follow this trail, the stronger the feeling becomes."  
  
"So? That just means you're sensing Kaoru again," Sano suggested.  
  
"No, I don't think so. See, it's the same kind of feeling, only more energized. More vibrant. Stronger. Like it's not from a human...but from something more like...like...a machine."  
  
"A machine?" Kaoru/Megumi mused.  
  
"Could it be, that the disturbance you're feeling now is the cause of all the strange happening lately, per say, the switches?" Misao/Aoshi asked.  
  
"Indeed, it is possible. That is my theory," Kenshin muttered. "I beginning to feel vibes from it, whatever it is, when it works. I believe that if we find the source and demolish it—"  
  
"We'd be put back together!!" Aoshi/Misao cheered, pumping a fist into the air. "You're smarter than you look. Himura!"  
  
"Gee...thanks," Kenshin sighed.  
  
"Tomorrow we better hurry, then," Sanosuke said, lying down.  
  
"Hai...." Yahiko yawned.  
  
As Misao/Aoshi blew out the lantern, he asked, "So, Battousai, do you always feel this presence?"  
  
"Dame, dame. Shikashi, it comes in waves. Like, oh, right now," Kenshin answered as a clap of thunder sounded and the rain started pouring.  
  
"Strange, this weather."  
  
"Hai."  
  
A.N.: Okay, that's it for this chappie. It may have seemed a little 'blah- y' but the info was all-important. Before you ask, the strange weather is also connected to the 'machine sent' thing. Don't worry. It'll all come together in time. Sighs and rubs sore fingers  
  
Well, it's getting late, and I gotta go. I'll update whenever I get the chance, I promise!  
  
Oh! And the next chappie is about what's going on with Kaoru. You won't want to miss it!  
  
Chao!  
GCN anime dragon 


	5. In which you feel sorry for Kaoru

A.N.: Here we go with the seriousness, sorta.... I finally updated, but the next one will be a longer wait. Sorry. But after the next chappie, I'm totally lost. So, I know you must hate it when I repeat and repeat and repeat myself, but bear with me. For all of you who reviewed: I love ya guys to pieces. ::Squeezes reviewers until they bust:: Oops....  
  
Really, I have nothing much to say but, THANK GOD SCHOOL'S OVER!! Hallelujah!!!! Freshman year is such a pain in the ass!! ::dances around in a little circle:: ....Curse ff.net for getting rid of all the faces and symbols. Whaaaa!  
  
OH! After you're done reading, check out my bio for a list of the best online anime/manga/video games and all fluff that goes along with it! Seriously, where else can you get Inuyasha Boxed Sets for only 32.99, Yu Yu Hakusho big Boxed Sets for the same, AND every Kenshin episode (all 95) for only 99.99...and I was not paid to say that---I am not soliciting. Don't get mad at me. This is my own opinion!  
  
Disclaimer: See chapters ahead!!!!  
  
Warped Reality: Chapter 5  
  
For the longest time, Kaoru couldn't, make sense of anything at all. The speed ...her eyes weren't used to it, so they registered was dark blurs.  
  
She was being carried, she knew that. When she glanced to the right, she could see the blue wrist and hand coverers (aw, poo! For the life of me, and that of KC we can't think of what they're called, soooooo....if you do, then you can tell me. Otherwise I don't give a rat's ass......) ...and the dainty fingers of her captor.  
  
Kaoru had been kidnapped many a time before, but never as someone else. And, she normally knew her captor and could guess their motives...but this person...he had called her Megumi; he had wanted Megumi.  
  
Kaoru recalled the incident.  
  
-----------Flashback-------------  
  
"...Be quiet now. Someone's coming," the stranger giggled.  
  
"Why, you..." Kaoru hissed, but a foot was placed firmly but lightly on her back as she lay, face down in the dirt.  
  
"Jou-chan! Jou-chan! Can you hear me?" She could hear Sanosukes's voice approaching fast.  
  
"San—" Kaoru began, but a tap from her attacker filled her mouth with dust.  
  
"I said, be quiet, and I wouldn't have had to do that," the boy scolded, just as Sano came into view.  
  
"Jou-chan! Kaoru! What in the hell?!" Sanosuke skidded to a halt just four feet away, as a fleeting look of surprise flashed across his face. "It's YOU!"  
  
"So it is," the boy grinned. "I'm so pleased that you remembered. You were the big dumb one with Himura-san, weren't you?"  
  
"I'll show you big and dumb!! Get your foot off her!!" Sano pulled back his fist, and in half a second was less than half a foot away from the boy.  
  
Then...the strangest thing happened.  
  
Flash! Thud! Thud! Thud! Flash!  
  
Kaoru felt the weight on her back shift and disappear, but only for a moment. At the same time, the boy blinked in and out of vision.  
  
She shifted her gaze to Sanosuke. He gave a gagging scream, and tipped forward, his left leg giving way. As he fell on his face, blood sprayed from his nose and mouth, soaking into the aku jacket. He hi the ground hard, less than a foot in front of Megumi/Kaoru's face.  
  
"Ah!" she yelped, as the boy picked her up around her waist .She was dumbfounded: This squeaky, annoying bastard had taken down Sanosuke, and she hadn't even seen him move.  
  
"Sanosuke...!" she screamed as everything blurred and went dark....  
  
------------End of Flashback-----------  
  
Megumi/Kaoru slumped and a couple of tears escaped her eyes. "Damn this stupid bastard! And damn my own self for my weakness! It's all my fault!" she cried in her mind.  
  
The two passed through a cold film, which chilled Kaoru to the bone, sending her shivering away. "Brrr," he captor muttered, which was the only thing he had spoken in the past hour.  
  
The soft blurs began to come into focus again. So, Kaoru could tell they were somewhere in the mountains, and that snow was falling. Somewhere that was far away from Tokyo.  
  
Their speed decreased further, until Kaoru could see they were approaching a small notch in a mountainside. A cave...one that was disguised at a first glance by snowdrifts and rocky outcroppings.  
  
Her captor was no more than jogging now, leaping gracefully over a snowdrift and skidding to a stop inside the warm shelter of the cave. Ice sparkled off the walls of the entrance, glistening down a deep, narrow tunnel that dug its way into the mountain.  
  
Bep...beep...bep...beep...bep....  
  
Some unidentified presence settled in on Kaoru's mind. It was kind of a feeling that the cave emitted, which sat just outside her conscious mind. The sensation was so faint; in fact that Megumi/Kaoru barely took notice of it.  
  
When Kaoru's captor had descended into the cave far enough that the already itty-bitty opening had shrunk to a pinpoint, he set Kaoru down gently. The tops of the walls were lined with glowing lanterns, which cast a gloomy blue light across the place.  
  
"...Tenken?...Is that you?...Have you retrieved my...prize? Hoo hoo hoo hoo...." Someone chuckled. Megumi/Kaoru stiffened. She knew that voice. She knew that laugh.  
  
'Shit. Shitshitshitshitshitshit,' she thought. It was starting to make sense now. But one thing she couldn't make sense of was: why would Takaeda Kanryu want anything to do with her? Oh...wait.  
  
She was Megumi.  
  
Bep...beep...bep...beep...bep....  
  
Megumi—of course! Megumi: The main instigator for Kanryu's arrest, his loss of power, his loss of WEALTH. The first and foremost person that he'd want dead if he ever got out.  
  
And, apparently, he was out, and in full power.  
  
"Hai, I have her, Takaeda-san," Soujirou said, edging Megumi/Kaoru into the cave.  
  
"Seriously, Tenken, is that any way to treat a prisoner? With gentle prodding?" Kanryu laughed. Suddenly a bright light flashed in Kaoru's head as Kanryu stepped forward and backhanded her. She hit her chin along the ground hard.  
  
Megumi/Kaoru was quickly back on her hands and knees glaring daggers though Kanryu. She opened her mouth wide, popping her jaw back into place.  
  
"You dirty..." she muttered.  
  
"Now, you don't talk to ME!" Kanryu yelled, kicking Megumi/Kaoru low in the gut, sending her rolling along the cold floor. When she rolled onto her feet, he laughed. "Don't worry dear, it's going to get much worse soon."  
  
"How comforting," Megumi/Kaoru muttered, taking a brave step forward. Kaoru was going to be damned is she was gonna let herself get used like this. She knew the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu, and she was gonna put it to use!  
  
However, that would be harder to accomplish with out a bokken, shinai, or anything at all.  
  
"I see you've never lost that feisty personality of yours, Takani Megumi. I do find it rather entertaining."  
  
"WHY?" Megumi/Kaoru demanded.  
  
"Why what?" Kanryu stepped closer, motioning for the boy Tenken to follow him. "You'll have to be more specific. Why the cave, or the Tenken, or your torture? Don't worry, my dear, you'll find out in good time."  
  
Kaoru raised her fists and charged right at Kanryu. "Stop calling me Megumi!!!!"  
  
Kanryu flinched and closed his eyes. He'd never had had time to react. But...someone did....  
  
Bep...beep...bep...beep...bep....  
  
Soujirou moved so quickly, Kaoru didn't even register it until blood began to drip off her fingers. He had used the tip of his sword to slash the muscles on the back of her wrists, then came back up to hit her with the back of the sword, crushing the delicate bones in her hand.  
  
"Aieeee!" Kaoru wailed, dropping to her knees, holding her mutilated hand in front of her face. The tiny cracks from the bones echoed off the icy walls, as did her scream.  
  
Eyes full of unfiltered pain and rage and sorrow stared holes through Soujirou. "Why????" she gasped through clenched teeth.  
  
He just stared back. Even though he had that same smile plastered on his face, his eyes were full of sorrow, longing.  
  
He was only a pawn in this game.  
  
"I knew you would try to fight, Megumi-san. I must say, I am surprised that you didn't try to pull that knife on me again. Back then, I had hoped that you would've used it on your own sweet neck...but now I'm rather glad you didn't."  
  
He snapped his fingers and Soujirou withdrew a few feet. He reached into his pocket and withdrew something. "Really, it's kind of ironic that after you betrayed me and ran away, trying to be a good girl, what's going to happen to you now...."  
  
'Nani? What's he talking about? What is he going to do?' she leaned backwards.  
  
Kanryu showed Megumi/Kaoru what was in his hand: A little triangle-shaped folded scrap of leather. Even Kaoru knew what that was.  
  
"Do you remember what this is, wench? Do you remember what it does to people?"  
  
'Oh, dear Kami-sama, he...wouldn't,' Kaoru panicked as she fell back on one hand, trying to squirm away. 'Ada, Kenshin! Help me! Yahiko! Even Megumi! Sano---oh, Sano! I'm sorry! You can't come...you're dead and its all my fault!' A small crystal liquid tear escaped one of her tightly -shut eyes, rolling slowly down her cheek.  
  
"Ah, you DO remember! Well, you'll remember everything, ever dirty little aspect of this drug, till you die from torture!!" he laughed. Laughed like a psycho. Laughed at her weakness.  
  
'Opium....'  
  
Bep...beep...bep...beep...bep....  
  
-----------------------------------------------------------------  
  
A.N.: And so that's it for this chappie. See what I mean...it can be serious, even with writing it! ::blows nose::  
  
I will update as soon as possible, but that might be a couple a weeks. Gomen nasi. I must go now. Our whole damn house, and I'm drinking a coke. Now Mt. Dew...Coke. That and the fact that my mom has this huge, unopened giant Easter bunny sitting in the kitchen is driving me insaaaaaane!  
  
VolleyPickle16: 'Driving?' as in, past tense. You're already crazy!  
  
RestOfFriends/Readers: ::Nods::  
  
GCN anime dragon: Oh, shut up! 


	6. In which the Kenshingumi arrives

A.N.: Here I am again. Been awhile hasn't it?? GOMEN NASI!!!!!!! (please don't kill me) I've been keeping busy, even though school is gone. Gotta work. Gotta watch TV. (Specifically 17 hours of Yu Yu Hakusho, Inuyasha, Kenshin Music Videos, Wolf's Rain, and The First Inuyasha Movie!!! WHEE!)  
  
(Wheee! Recently bought eps. 37-66 of UNCUT Yu Yu Hakusho on DVD,Think...the end o the Dark Tornament, and OMG is it awesome. Seriously. It's a must see.)  
  
This chappie starts off a little "whoopee-doo-da-day," but have no fear, it gets tons better. I just had to get into it again, you see.  
  
Now, on with the story. WHEEEE! (Thanx a lot Bri....wheeee....)  
  
Disclaimer: (almost forgot) I don't own any copywrited stuff at all. Wheee!

* * *

WARPED REALITY: CHAPTER 6  
  
Sanosuke was floating through clouds of blue cotton, enjoying the absolute peace...the serenity, the dead quiet....  
  
'Sano...Sano...Sanosuke....get up....'  
  
He heard something...someone calling his name through the quiet.  
  
'Shush...I don't wanna...' he murmured. The clouds around him began to shiver and quake. An earthquake?!  
  
'...Sanosuke...morning...Sanosuke....' The voice was more insistent now.  
  
'But I don't wanna....'  
  
"SANO, NO BAKA ROOSTER! WAKE YOUR LAZY BUTT UP BEFORE I SHAVE YOUR HEAD!!!"  
  
Sanosuke awoke to someone shaking him roughly. That someone being Megumi/Kaoru.  
  
"Seriously, Sano, you couldn't be a bigger lump if you tried," she was saying. "Ada! You're finally awake." She got right down to business. "Kenshin wanted to get a head start today. The distraction in the whole 'ki' thing is really starting to get to him now. We must be getting close."  
  
She blinked as Sano popped his jaw. "Do you sense it?"  
  
"The disturbance? Iai...but, there is a great deal of tension in the air. That, I can sense."  
  
"You would," Kaoru/Megumi smiled.  
  
Yahiko poked his head in through the door, holding a tofu bowl. "Hey guys, if your done flirting, we're leeeeeeeeaving."  
  
"Excuse me?" Sano stood up. Yahiko ran, fast.  
  
"I'll get you for that you little brat!!" Sano ran after him yelling.  
  
Kaoru/Megumi sighed, shook her head. 'When will he ever learn...?' In the next moment, she wondered who she meant: Sano or Yahiko.  
  
Kenshin poked his head in next, "Hurry up, Megumi-san, or Sanosuke will chase Yahiko there before we leave, that he will."  
  
Kaoru/Megumi nodded, standing up. She followed him outside, stepping over a few tofu blocks.  
  
Misao/Aoshi and Aoshi/Misao were already outside, attempting to wait patiently. Yahiko and Sano were currently running little circles around them. The sun was shining brightly, and there wasn't a cloud in the sky, as opposed to the night before.  
  
Kenshin adjusted his sakabatou in his hakama's belt, straitened up and followed the trail again. The Tenken had come very close to running through the inn they had spent the night at. The rain from the previous night had all but washed away the trail. In places where they hadn't been deep enough, they were gone; so tracking them from now on would be mostly educated guesswork.  
  
This fact did not make Kenshin happy.  
  
For now, the trail was definitely headed into the mountains, down a specific trail made from rushing water eroding the rock. The walkway itself was covered with meting snow and mud puddles, but it was a better place to start then clambering over the mountains.  
  
"Come on. We must go now, that we must." Kenshin turned his head towards the others, prodding them to follow. Misao/Aoshi and Aoshi/Misao gladly followed, urgent to find a way to return them to normal. Kaoru/Megumi followed also, though not without a little tugging on Sano's arm to get his attention. Even then, Sano decide he had to chase Yahiko once more around the inn before the two of them caught up to the rest of the group, panting and bickering.  
  
"Sano, I told you to quit it! Kenshin said we had to go!" Yahiko panted.  
  
"One of these days, Yahiko...one of these days," Sanosuke grumbled, plodding along beside Misao/Aoshi, who had the same serious look plastered on 'her' face.  
  
Aoshi/Misao chuckled, patting Sano on his shoulder. "Maa maa, Sano."  
  
They were headed off into the mountains...that was the place that Kenshin sensed Kaoru's ki. She was getting closer...  
  
'Just be patient...' he told himself. He would find Kaoru. He had to.  
  
The mountains. They loomed in the distance, growing larger and larger, dwarfing all the buildings and trees that any of them had ever seen. Kenshin felt even shorter.  
  
"So, Kenshin...how much further??" Yahiko asked.  
  
"I'm not sure..." Kenshin told the truth. "But I do know for a fact that we ARE getting closer. I can sense Kaoru...but moreover, the machine."  
  
Yahiko rolled his eyes. "Oh yeah, the machine." The boy wasn't sure if he believed Kenshin on that part. How could a machine be controlling anything? And why were they mainly the one's affected?  
  
Since the sun was shining, the snow on the mountain trail was melting, leaving little muddy puddles that Yahiko became amused with. Jumping in every one, seeing how far the mud would splatter.  
  
Sano had his hands in his pockets, watching Yahiko bounce around and every one just plod along. 'How boring,' he thought, sure, they were on a mission...and a very serious one at that...but that didn't mean that they had to all be serious themselves. Perhaps, a lively conversation, or something would quicken the pace, add amusement to the journey. Something like...a snowball.  
  
"It's cold here," Kaoru/Megumi shivered slightly.  
  
"I think the weather is beautiful." Aoshi/Misao spread 'his' arms wide at the sky. "The sun, the breeze the surroundings..."  
  
Misao/Aoshi groaned. "It's muddy and slushy."  
  
Sano raised his eyebrows, smiling.  
  
"Hai, but don't you think that it's all kind of artsy?? The bare path with the small hill of snow all around, in the mountains?? So what's a little mud?"  
  
"It's fun!" Yahiko laughed, jumping again. A little splash of mud landed on Misao/Aoshi's ninja outfit. In response, Misao/Aoshi stopped and grumbled: "That's why I hate mud." 'She' leaned over, brushing the mud off with her hand.  
  
SPLAT!  
  
A semi-melted snowball beamed her/him on the back of the head.  
  
"What the hell?!" Misao/Aoshi fumed, rubbing the snow out of her/his hair. "Who was that?!"  
  
She/he spun around, and saw Yahiko, hiding behind Aoshi/Misao, who was laughing. Then there was Kenshin and Kaoru/Megumi, who just kept walking on ahead. And then, there was Sano, who seemed normal except he was smiling so big his ears might pop off.  
  
"You...."  
  
Sano smiled bigger.  
  
So as the rest traveled along mostly soundlessly, Sano and Misao/Aoshi were in the back, running around, with Sano giggling like a maniac and Misao/Aoshi yelling: "Remember that kodachi offer last night?? Do you want that?!?!"  
  
More snowballs were thrown.  
  
Kenshin sighed, lowered his head. Though he himself was only concentrating on the mission of saving his koishii, he had to admit that the others needed some cheer. That would make time go faster, with them happy...or at least, entertained.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sometime later, Kenshin came to a sudden stop as they were walking, causing the others all to stammer, so they didn't run in to one another. "What'd you stop for, Kenshin??" Yahiko asked.  
  
Kenshin turned his head very quickly, scanning all the land around him. But he didn't say anything.  
  
"Battousai..." Misao/Aoshi prodded impatiently.  
  
"She's here," Kenshin said, somewhat detached. "I can sense her...and the disturbance...but where..."  
  
Kenshin spun around in a little circle, scanning the sky, the snow, all the many, many rocks in the mountains. He could sense Kaoru's ki strongly, she was here. It felt like she was right next to him, yet all around him. He couldn't pinpoint exactly where it was coming from! The machine--- distraction!---was confusing all his senses!  
  
"But I can't...I can't find her," Kenshin gritted his teeth, growing more frustrated be the second.  
  
Misao/Aoshi turned around squinting. He could also sense the disturbance now. "Not when we're this close...."  
  
Kenshin turned around, a sort of fire burning in his eyes. "You say that as if we were going to give up. Never would I abandon Kaoru...even if it truly were impossible to find her."  
  
Aoshi/Misao tried to smile warmly. "That's not what he meant. You should know us, Himura...that we need to find Kaoru and this disturbance just as much as you do. We're looking until we can find her." 'He' looked up, toward the mountainous cliffs ahead, and behind. "Perhaps..."  
  
Kenshin narrowed his eyes, following his gaze.  
  
"Perhaps they are inside one of the mountains...."  
  
"Inside?? How could they be inside??" Yahiko asked.  
  
"Well, like a cave, or at the top...or in one of the overhangs." Aoshi/Misao murmured. "Like there...or there...or there..."  
  
Kenshin, Yahiko, Kaoru/Megumi, and Sanosuke looked around. "What I can't see nothing." Yahiko muttered.  
  
"That's because you're too little," Aoshi/Misao, "that you can't see over the edges of the pathway, or over the overhangs. I can."  
  
"Ahem..." Misao/Aoshi looked a little perturbed. "That's only because you're in my body, you half-pint. I can't see a thing down here."  
  
"Nor can this one," Kenshin coughed quietly. Yahiko and Kaoru/Megumi smiled and nodded.  
  
Aoshi/Misao grabbed Sano by the shoulders, shaking him gently in a 'buddy hug.' "Hey, we're taller! We can look," 'he' beamed. Mostly to Sano, she added, now look up. See any caves."  
  
"Let's see, snow...snow...rock..."  
  
Aoshi/Misao gazed over the mountain ahead of her. She had a weird feeling, a sort of vibe coming out of the mountain. Then she saw what most people who were not members of the Oniwaban group would have overlooked: A patch of snow that had melted away from a warmer area of rock, revealing a darker pit. It was a cave mostly disguised by rocky overhangs, and would have been completely invisible from the ground if all the snow hadn't melted away.  
  
"THERE!!" he/she yelled, startling everyone.  
  
"You found it??" Kenshin stammered, standing on his tippy toes, trying to see what Aoshi/Misao had seen. No use.  
  
"Yes! I felt a strange disturbance coming from this mountain, and I can see a very disguised cave. What better place could there be? If all the snow were still here, it could be invisible."  
  
"This direction...hai, hai...the disturbance is stronger. Let's go!" Kenshin grabbed his sakabatou with his left hand, keeping himself ready for anything.  
  
"Follow me!" Aoshi/Misao used his arms to lift himself over the edge of the walkway. She lent a hand down to the short rurouni, pulling him over as well. Misao/Aoshi simply jumped over the ledge, dusting herself off after she did,  
  
"Oooo, cool, let me try that." Yahiko was amused. He lept up, but unfortunately for his, he slipped on a pile of slush and slipped, falling back down again.  
  
"Ouch."  
  
"I could've told you that would happen, Yahiko-chan," Kaoru/Megumi sighed, helping him to his feet. He grumbled some inaudible complaint, and then allowed Aoshi/Misao to help him over.  
  
Sano, who was already over the edge, lent a hand to Kaoru/Megumi, who was struggling to get her leg over the edge of the walkway. She looked up, a little confused.  
  
"Here," he said, pulling her over.  
  
Now that they all were out of the walkway, Aoshi/Misao leading the way. "Now, how far away exactly is this cave?" Kenshin mused, as Yahiko leaned on him to keep from falling backwards again.  
  
"Not far! Keep it up guys; we're almost there. Almost to Kaoru. And a way to become normal again!" Aoshi/Misao said cheerfully. "Though I must say, I will miss being this tall Aoshi-sama."  
  
"..." Misao/Aoshi grumbled.  
  
------------------------------------------------------------------------ ----------------------------  
  
They climbed. After they got used to the strange landscape under their feet, the going went quicker. For most of the time, Yahiko sat perched on top of Aoshi/Misao's shoulders, keeping a lookout for anything strange or dangerous.  
  
But, the trip up was uneventful. Seeing as their enemy hid in the cave before them, Kenshin wasn't surprised. He was, however, very impatient to reach Kaoru. And his impatience grew the closer they got to the cave.  
  
Aoshi/Misao set Yahiko down. "Here this is it," 'he' whispered, pointing with one hand and placing a finger over his mouth for 'shhh' with the other.  
  
Kenshin glared. "Hai."  
  
"THIS stupid little hole??" Yahiko mused. The cave was only a few feet wide, and just barely tall enough for someone as tall as Sano to enter, let alone Aoshi.  
  
"Hai...it is probably much larger inside." Misao/Aoshi crossed 'her' arms.  
  
"Well then, lets go!" Sanosuke ducked slightly, entering the cave first. Everyone else was right on his heels.  
  
Kenshin popped the sakabatou out of the sheath just an inch using his thumb. "Hurry."  
  
"Hai." They all follow him deeper into the cave, surprised at how the ice- covered walls spread out in every direction, widening and expanding the hallway so the an elephant could march unharmed down the center.  
  
"So, what happens—" Sano began a bit too loudly. Kaoru/Megumi grabbed him by one of his ears and pulled him down to her level.  
  
"Shhhhh.... do you want them to notice us?? Keep you're voice down."  
  
Sano stayed down close. "Fine, whatever. My question is: What happens if we DO find any enemies. Do we beat the crap outta them, interrogate them or what??"  
  
Kaoru/Megumi poked Kenshin, wondering if he DID know what he was going to do if he came upon a foe, when they all about had heart attacks at the sound on another voice, new to some of them, all to familiar for the rest.  
  
"Good question. You better figure out the answer quick," the voice said. It sounded as if it belonged to a small child or woman, but Kenshin knew better.  
  
"So, it was you, Seta Soujirou the Tenken," Kenshin shouted, crouching down into the Battojutsu position.  
  
"Oh, you knew?" the boy asked innocently.  
  
"Who else leaves a trail made of grooves caused by the Shukuchi?" Kenshin was starting to get really pissed off now. (A.N.: And we all know what that means, ne??) His anger was a bit confused at what to be targeted at: this boy, the place, his friends, Kaoru's unknown captor, or everything in the whole damn world.  
  
It found its target at Soujirou...  
  
Even though they were in a cave, the wind seemed to increase, blowing the cool snow-and-dirt smelling wind in little cyclones around the room. A small puff of dust released itself from the floor, blowing right past Kenshin's feet.  
  
Soujirou copied Kenshin's stance, cocking his head to the right and smiling wider. "You seem a bit perturbed, Himura-san. I bet you never thought you'd see me again."  
  
Kenshin clamped his eyes shut. "You bastard. You kidnap my Kaoru and think I would be amused with you're idle chitchat?? Tell me, the in the name of Kami-sama—" Kenshin open his eyes as Soujirou cut him off.  
  
"Who is this Kaoru?"  
  
Kenshin mentally slapped himself for forgetting that Soujirou had actually kidnapped Megumi-san, at least to him. Now the dumbass was going to get all innocently confused. Kenshin didn't have time fore this!!  
  
"Step aside, and I will not fight you," Kenshin lowered his gaze so that his thick bangs ell over his face. "Step aside Tenken."  
  
"Gomen nasi, Himura-san, but I cannot do that. I have direct orders to kill anyone who tries to rescue Megumi-san." The Tenken closed his eyes anime- style, so that they poked upward like rainbows. "Anyway, I'm not too worried about fighting you. Remember, you had to resort to using the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu Ouki Ama Kakeru Ryu No Hirameki when you last fought me. And now that I know its secrets there's no way that I can lose."  
  
"If you don't mind my saying, you haven't fought me before," Kenshin murmured, almost inaudibly.  
  
"Nanigoto?? (Translation: What was said?)" Soujirou asked, opening his eyes wide.  
  
Kenshin lifted his head, revealing eyes that where practically a glowing amber. With the movement, the small strap of leather that held Kenshin's hair in place broke, so that it blew free in the wind. Kenshin was glaring fiercely, and Soujirou swore he could see fangs as he spoke in a deeper, somewhat detached voice.  
  
"Iai, you have never fought me: The Hitokiri Battousai."

* * *

A.N.: Yes, I know, that was a bad place to end it. But think of it this way, I can't wait to write thee next part, so I'll update quicker. Wheeeee! If you didn't notice, you may not care, but the character(s) feature is now Megumi and Sano...but it's still also a Kenshin/Kaoru fic too!! I'm just widening my viewer option.  
  
I wrote this entire chapter while watching/listening to Anime Music Videos. Music ranging from Evanescence to Linkin Park, Slipknot, Creed, Madonna and Limp Biskit. Hey, it's what I do to get inspiration. Speaking of which, IF YOU KNOW OF ANY GOOD ANIME MUSIC VIDEO DOWNLOAD, SITES PLEASE TELL ME!!!!!  
  
Arigato!  
  
P.S. If you've never seen the Yu Yu episodes with Jin, you won't get the whee! thing, because he always goes around saying 'whooo! and wheee! and such,' you'll just think I've lost my mind. But it wasn't my fault...::sniff:: Bri did it first...::sniff::  
  
Dake kuchiokashi!!!! (Just joking!!!!)  
  
But in not dake kuchiokashi matters, I feel real safe. Not! My parents leave for awhile and my mom takes special care to warn me to lock the door because someone hacked some people in Peoria, and that's not far from here. ::Shaky:: Whee-e-e-e.... And I don't think she meant 'hack' as in computers. Yippee! I feel great! I guess I'll survive...goodie....  
  
Now I have to go get myself prepped up to update my Inuyasha fic...and do dishes.  
  
So, sayonara!  
  
-GCN anime dragon :P 


	7. In which the plot thickens

GCN: Hello all! I'm here with the next chappie. I figure I'd better update...before I get grounded from the computer. It sucks I know, but it happens to me often. :::Sigh::: I just don't know.  
  
A new development that you may be interested in is the recent production of the Anime Clan Online's new website. It was created by me and the rest of the Clan, Sano99, XearoJDH, Deraigon, Kenshin'sChick, Inuyasha'sDaily and the VolleyPickle16.... If you have time, you could check out their stories, others of mine, or the website, which is listed in my bio as a link and as the homepage. (h t t p : a n i m e f r e a k 2 0 0 7 . t r i p o d . c o m ) (There aren't any spaces in the whole thing...but kept deleting it when I had it the normal way. Why, I don't know...) Our site contains anime pics, downloads, news, links and an FFVII/Advent Children section. Arigato for your support!  
  
So nobody gets upset with me, I'm telling all my readers not to get too upset if it takes a while to update. I have alto going on right now, and I'm trying my damnedest to get everything typed up as much as possible. Now with the website and the fact that my parents are limiting my computer hours...heh heh...not good.  
  
Now, onward with the story....  
  
WARPED REALITY – CHAPTER 7  
  
Soujirou eased his foot back into a ready position. His right hand drifted down closer to his katana. He was personally unfamiliar with the person that Himura Kenshin had become. Sure as hell he had heard about the legendary, merciless, cold Hitokiri, but had never thought of meeting him since that day way back when Shishio had set the two against each other.  
  
Back then, the Tenken had never thought that he would see the Battousai. But now, it was all too obvious that the only way to draw out the demon was to threaten not Kenshin's life, but the life of someone he was closest to.  
  
It had been along time since Soujirou had been afraid for his life. This was the first time since that fateful day when his adoptive family had threatened to slaughter him. And now, he was felling again that slow sinking feeling.  
  
He didn't want to be here, in the cold, damp prison-like cave. He had been forced to....  
  
:::::Enter Flashback:::::  
  
Soujirou had been walking for a few days now. His feet were hurting, and the front of his gi and hakama was covered with dust. But he was absolutely thrilled with the entire planet, and showed it trough the real, genuine smile that was around his face. He was free!  
  
It had been a few months since Shishio Makoto had been killed. So far no one had discovered his secret; that he was the Tenken, one who had caused the country so much trouble not too long ago.  
  
At least he didn't think anyone knew. Yet, as he was very aware of the fact that someone was following him as he pulled into a roadside restaurant.  
  
'What'll it be sonny?' an elderly waitress asked, wearing a light pink robe and greasy apron, her thin white hair pulled into a bun.  
  
'Oh...nothing much. Bring me a couple of strawberry rice cakes, if you please,' Soujirou had answered, making sure that his sword stayed hidden under the dark brown cloak he was wearing.  
  
As the lady moved off, a tall, shadowy figure moved into Soujirou's field of vision. Whoever it was didn't concern Soujirou in the least, he was the Tenken with the powers of Shukuchi after all; he had nothing to fear. And he assumed that nobody in their right mind would pick a fight in such a crowded diner such as this in the Meiij Era.  
  
But he was wrong.  
  
The figure sat in front of him, on the other side of the table. Soujirou looked up from the table to view the person out.  
  
'Konnichiwa, young sir,' the figure said in a deep man's voice, not bothering to introduce himself or remove the hood that shielded his eyes.  
  
'Nani?' Soujirou wasn't sure what was going on now.  
  
'I know who you are, Seta Soujirou the Tenken. You were second in command to the Shishio Makoto-sama. You are also a mass murderer, a Hitokiri turned rurouni, correct?'  
  
Soujirou had stiffened up, grasping the katana at his side. Who was this stranger? He threatened Soujirou's newfound peace and carefree way of life!  
  
'You know I am correct. What would all these people do if they discovered one of the most wanted criminal in Japan was seated right next to them?' the stranger cackled, blowing a smoke ring around his hood.  
  
'Who the hell are you?' Soujirou looked frantically around, looking for a hasty, yet inconspicuous exit.  
  
'If you agree, your new employer,' the stranger pulled off his hood, revealing a shaggy mushroom haircut and squinty eyes behind square glasses.  
  
It was Kanryu.  
  
'I'll make this simple,' the former drug dealer and thug began, 'if you agree to work for me, I'll do all that is in my power to keep your identity a secret. If you don't,' he laughed, 'well, how long do you think the news of your face will take to spread throughout the entire country?'  
  
Soujirou's eyes widened immensely, and his hand automatically clutched the hilt of his weapon.  
  
'Go ahead, kill me. Either way, you're trapped; the only way out is to work for me. Or your life on this world is over.'  
  
Soujirou had stared for what seemed like an hour. Every other person in the building was milling around normally, not knowing that an outrageous fight could break out among them at any second. The Tenken decided that he didn't deserve the right to do that to them.  
  
'What do you want me to do?'  
  
Kanryu smiled.  
  
:::::End of Flashback:::::  
  
That's how it had come to this. That bastard Kanryu had gotten him trapped in a 'damned-if-you-do, damned-if-you-don't' situation. Now Soujirou had to follow every order he was given, no matter if it meant loosing his conscious again or loosing the dwindling remainder of his sanity.  
  
Soujirou clamped his hand around the hilt of the katana, drawing it out half an inch with his other thumb. He could not afford to loose to Kenshin this time.  
  
"Are you going to attack?" Kenshin asked in low detached voice; not his own. "Or are you perhaps, giving up?"  
  
"I cannot give up this time Himura-san," Soujirou said calmly, not wanting to betray the fact that he was scared to the death of the malevolent glow Kenshin's eyes held.  
  
"Then you will die."  
  
Kenshin's outline shifted for a moment, then he disappeared. A strange tingling at the back of Soujirou's neck alerted him to the fact that Kenshin was right behind him, ready to bring the Sakabatou down on his head. Soujirou ducked just in time, allowing the sword to crash into the ground of rock, thus creating gravel.  
  
Not ten feet away, the rest of the Kenshin-gumi stood transfixed. It wasn't the first time any of them had seen Kenshin loose it, but it was certainly the fiercest.  
  
"Is it just me, or did he have fangs?" Yahiko asked stupidly.  
  
"He was mighty pissed," Sanosuke whispered worriedly back.  
  
"Do you suppose we should stop him?" Kaoru/Megumi asked, kneading her hands together, making sure to stay safe behind Aoshi/Misao.  
  
"Iae," Misao/Aoshi shook her head, crossing her arms. "I don't believe the Battousai would ever forgive us if we interrupted him while he was saving his wife. Her being in danger brings out another side to the Hitokiri all together. I doubt that there is an 100 percent chance that he would not turn on us as well."  
  
"NANI? You mean, 'he'd never forgive us if we didn't stop him from killing someone again,' ne? Don't you know what that would do to him?" Kaoru/Megumi stated.  
  
"It's a price all warriors have to pay: Taking the chance that they will have to murder their opponent. All of us must deal with the burden as we seem fit," Misao/Aoshi muttered.  
  
"Oooo, deep," Sanosuke looked for a joke at this time.  
  
"Aoshi-sama, you know better than that. Not every one has the time to sit on their ass all day and meditate," Aoshi/Misao patted the shorter Misao/Aoshi on the head, earning him a glare from her. "Himura has a life. A home. A wife..." he grated.  
  
Misao/Aoshi snorted. "For how long?"  
  
Back over to the battle, Soujirou tried a desperate horizontal slash that ended up with him falling on his butt. Kenshin took advantage of the moment to make a slash of his own. Soujirou blocked the blow aimed at his leg, but the force of the attack caused his sword to waver, and the Sakabatou cut a jagged mark across the back of his leg.  
  
"Aaaaghhh!" Soujirou complained. The cut wasn't deep, but hell did it hurt. And even a wound of such slight measure, when on the leg, could totally destroy his ability to use the Shukuchi.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------------  
  
'Beep...bep...beep...bep...beep...'  
  
Kaoru felt sick. She wasn't going to let this deranged creep force some drug down her throat. So as he grabbed her by the hair and poured it into her mouth, she threw up all over him; and at the same time, kicked him low in the gut. The ex-crime lord flew back into the wall, making an 'Ack!' sound.  
  
She lost her balance and fell hard on her backside. Kanryu seemed to bounce; as he was quickly back on his feet. And he looked none too happy.  
  
"You insubordinate bitch..." he hissed, righting himself, wiping away some of the crap that stained his expensive dress suit.  
  
Kaoru started to struggle away, but he grabbed her by her hair once again, dragging her back into his capture. She attempted to turn around and claw his eyes out, but had forgotten that she was too badly wounded from before.  
  
'No...I have to survive to get out of this...I must see Kenshin...' Megumi/Kaoru ran the same thoughts over and over again in her head as Kanryu lifted her up off the floor.  
  
"You may have lived a bit longer, bitch, if you had simply played along. But this time, you will die. I'll make sure of that!"  
  
Megumi/Kaoru turned her eyes to face him. She didn't fear this man—this totally evil, sinister man. She was aware that he was dangerous...that he COULD very well destroy her in the blink of an eye. But she wasn't afraid of him.  
  
With one last snarl of contempt, Kanryu flung Kaoru at the ground. She felt a rushing wind, then nothing more as her head his the rock with a sharp 'crack!'...  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------------------  
  
Soujirou fell backwards, tripping over a clump of fallen ice. He watched as the Battousai suddenly shivered. He averted his amber gaze to further down the tunnel, his expression softening into one of pain for only a moment.  
  
It was as if he sensed something that Soujirou had no connection to...  
  
GCN: (got tired of righting A.N.)  
  
Don't fret. Kaoru is a tough chick. Do you really think the voices of evil will win over her?? Do you?? Well...maybe...  
  
The next chapter should be up soon, at least after I get a few reviews from the frequent comers that need a chance to catch up...  
  
Till then, ja ne!  
  
Now, check out my other stories and website!!!!  
  
---GCNanimedragon 


	8. In which one must battle inner demons

GCN: OMG!!! It has taken WAY too long to update, I know, know, don't sue me, I APOLOGIZE. I left it at a cliffhanger too, AUGH! So please forgive me!

Oh, by the way, I heard that a few of you were confused with the line: _"She felt a rushing wind, then nothing more as her head his the rock with a sharp 'crack!'..." _It was a major typo! It was supposed to be "...nothing more as her head hit the rock..." Basically, Kaoru hit her head and is going unconscious. So, does that make sense now?

I hate school. (Who doesn't?) Grrrrrr, it's just such a pain in the ass now, and it's so hard to get up every morning. Heh, even this weekend is totally screwed, what with two field shows, a parade and a football game for band and all. Ug. So I'm updating now, because if don't it's likely to be another month!

WARPED REALITY---CHAPTER 8

...Beep...bep...beep...bep...beep...

Taking advantage of the fact that the Battousai was no longer facing him, Soujirou pulled back his arm, creating an arc with his katana. Leveling the sword with his eye-line, the Tenken trust the sword forward, aimed right between Kenshin's shoulder blades.

'I got him!' Soujirou swelled with accomplishment. The moment was fleeting however, as Kenshin's outline blurred again and the shot missed completely.

"I am not so foolish as to turn my back on my opponent, if the opponent still has the ability to surprise me," Kenshin grumbled. "You lost your advantage of being emotionless a long time ago, Tenken. I can now read your every thought."

"Teh," Soujirou snorted. He wouldn't let this backtalk get to him. He had a duty to protect Kanryu-sama. A duty that he would complete, even sparing his life.

Kenshin readied his arm again, paying full attention on the boy now. His left hand lay a bit lower, dangling, and ready to swoop upward and guide the blade of the sword. Thinking frantically, Soujirou concluded that Kenshin was going to use the Kuso-Ryu-Sen....but how to dodge it?

No time to think!

Kenshin was no longer against the wall! He had seized the moment, driving towards Soujirou like a bat out of hell, and Soujirou hadn't had time to dodge.

Soujirou didn't even know what hit him. The next moment, he was soaring through the air, the Battousai above him, with the point of the Sakabatou lodged in his gut. The sword with the reversed end was clumsy for cutting, but the blade still had a point that was as deadly as any other sword.

"Aaaaargh!" As the seconds passed, the sword dug deeper and deeper into his flesh, sending small sprays all over his gi and Kenshin himself. As Kenshin's jumping momentum came to a halt, Soujirou slipped off the end of the blade, falling into the rock floor with a grunt and more blood.

Kenshin adjust his leap so that he landed gracefully only a few feet from where Soujirou landed. The Battousai stood up strait, causing his hair to fly back over his shoulders. "Now, you will tell me where I can find Kaoru."

Soujirou was trying to sit up, and talking was not his a high priority on his mind, considering that when even breathing, blood spilled out from between his clenched teeth. The boy began supporting himself on his elbows, still clinging to his sword.

"Well? Kaoru may be dying because of you. If she dies, you will too. Now tell me where she is!" Kenshin's eyes flickered, terrible sadness entering the amber gaze.

Soujirou coughed, a slight smile on his face. "I cannot do that, Himura-san." He slowly rose to his feet, covering his wound with his free hand. The stab wound, combined with the gash on his leg. Pretty much sealed his fate. He knew he could no longer win. But what could he do, run away? If there was any chance that Kenshin would loose to Kanryu, Soujirou knew that the ex-thug would soon come after him. Either way his life was over.

In any case, he could not betray his master.

Kenshin had a sadistically amused grin on his usually peaceful face. "You still refuse to give up Kaoru?"

_Kaoru...Kaoru...Kaoru_...what the hell did he mean? Soujirou had told him that he had kidnapped Megumi-san, and yet...hadn't she herself said that her name was not Megumi? At the time, it had sounded ludicrous, but now...perhaps a greater force was at work?

"We don't have anyone named Kaoru!" Soujirou gasped, reading his sword again.

"That's a load of shit and you know it! Something in this base is warping reality, and you know what it is, don't you? The strange occurrences in weather, items disappearing all over the country, people ending up in other people's bodies...something here is the cause of it, and you know it!"

"Just tell us Soujirou! Other wise he'll kill you!" Kaoru/Megumi yelled from the sidelines. She was getting more nervous as time passed. Instead of becoming the rurouni again, Kenshin was drifting further and further away. She was worried that their fun-loving rurouni would be gone forever if he did kill Soujirou.

"Quiet, Megumi! This partially happened because of you, so stay out!" Kenshin hissed, spinning around to face his friends, eyes glowing.

Megumi gasped. He...she...Kaoru...yes, it was her fault wasn't it? The words cut her deep, sending a chill down her spine and causing it to become harder for her to breath.

"That was cold, Battousai," Misao/Aoshi murmured.

"Kenshin! You don't need him to tell you! We'll find her later in the cave anyway! Let's go!" Sanosuke tried for a bit of playfulness in his voice, but he couldn't hide the fact that he was deathly afraid for his friend. His words went right over Kenshin's head. Even when Sano tried to lead the stunned Kaoru/Megumi and Yahiko further down the tunnel, it was if Kenshin had forgotten that they had even existed. It was all about the killing now.

"Shit!" Sanosuke cursed, punching the wall.

"Kenshin! Kenshin, what's wrong with you?!" Yahiko screamed.

'M-m-m-megumi?!' Soujirou didn't have time to attack Kenshin's exposed back. Instead his mind was reeling. They called that shorter, young woman Megumi?! Soujirou was sure he had a ridiculous expression on his face, his eyes wide and mouth open.

He had just got it.

::::::::FLASHBACK::::::::

"_Demo...Kanryu-san, what is it for?" Soujirou asked. After the giant white sheet had settled onto the floor, revealing Kanryu's new 'toy' an uneasy feeling had settled across the entire cave._

_Soujirou had now been under Kanryu's control for just a little over a week now. Then Kanryu had called him in, beaming with joy and an almost scary laugh._

"_It is my revenge," Kanryu crowed, petting the smooth steel. The machine was monstrous; a dark, ominous being filled with a heartless soul. It had the ability to control threads of time, of reality. The squat, fat thing was bubbling with gears and tubes, and overflowing with multicolored wires. In the center of the steel donut wanna-be, was a glowing core, the color of blood. _

_Soujirou turned to Kanryu, obviously confused. "Demo...."_

"_How, you ask?" Kanryu interrupted his own speech with a menacing laugh. "With this machine, I can regain everything I lost! I want the power! The money! The physical wealth of every shape and kind! I want to rule! With this I can slip between this damn Meiji government's fingers and control the country from behind!"_

_Soujirou blinked a few times before asking, "But why? What good is a lot of money going to do for you if you live your life in hiding?"_

"_Baka. You lived with Shishio Makoto, yet you still have to ask that question. He wanted to rule through killing, with the strong. But he was a fool. It's much easier when you can run the world through money."_

_Soujirou swallowed hard. What had he gotten himself into? "But with a machine of such magnitude, you don't suppose that it will have horrible side effects?"_

"_Sure. Weather patterns will be askew, even human beings will wake up one morning and have altered personalities, malfunctioned, deformed bodies. But that is all of little consequence to me! Nothing will stop me this time._

_Soujirou just stood there, as the red core of the machine began to pulsate, bathing Kanryu and his bodyguard with red light, creating the illusion that their cloths were soaked with blood._

_As it worked, the machine emitted a hallow, haunting sound, one that confused Soujirou's senses and chilled his whole body._

..._beep...bep...beep...bep...beep..._

"_Kami-sama of this earth, bow to me and complete my will!" The core swirled and pulsated, creating echoes of light the engulfed the room. All Soujirou could see in his mind were the flames of hell, with the devil laughing, spying them as new vessels of evil. It was not a nice thought._

_Kanryu bared his teeth, which looked red in the light. "One by one, the departments of the government will fall, sending their wealth to me, and dying by your sword. Do you understand, Tenken?"_

_Soujirou just stared, finding his mouth dry, palms covered in sweat. This is what this monster wanted him to do? He looked at him innocently, pleading that he release him from his service. He didn't want to be here!! He didn't want to kill again!!_

_Kanryu laughed at the boy's helpless look. "Now you are mine."_

..._beep...bep...beep...bep...beep..._

::::::::End of FLASHBACK::::::::

Kanryu had been right. In addition to deceiving the government, normal, innocent civilians were drug into the power struggle. That girl standing with the Battousai's friends, she was Megumi. And their hostage, she was someone innocent.

THWACK!

The handle of Kenshin's Sakabatou connected squarely with Soujirou's chin. The Tenken totally lost his footing, and he was sent careening into the wall of ice. The cold bit at his skin, ice chips showering him with sharp edges and an icy chill.

Fresh blood flowed from the teeth that had been damaged from the blow. Soujirou's head was spinning, as his sight faded in and out of focus. Clenching his teeth hard, he was able to cling to consciousness. But he was helpless. Utterly, utterly helpless.

Kenshin took his steps slow and deliberately, until he was towering over his prey. Soujirou was a wreck. One of his eyes was crying blood; that side of his face starting to swell and bruise. His right leg was curled up curiously underneath him, bent at an angle that could not possibly been natural. The stab wound in his gut was refusing to quit bleeding, soaking the surrounding clothing and oozing onto the floor.

"You poor bastard," Kenshin hissed, stopping in front of the boy. His eyes were still slits in anger, his tousled hair adding to his wild look. "You will now die!"

"Kenshin, NO!" Kaoru/Megumi wailed, snapping out of her funk. She tugged to get of Sanosuke's grasp.

"Kitsune no baka! If you get in front of him now, he'll kill you to!" Sanosuke hollered.

"No, never Kenshin!" Yahiko joined in the fight.

Aoshi/Misao and Misao/Aoshi just stood, stoned. Kaoru/Megumi struggled with a new furiousity. "Kenshin, you can't kill him! Remember who you are! Some back!"

"I am the Battousai," Kenshin smiled.

Soujirou curled into a tiny ball. "Himura-san, Himura-san please kill me," he whimpered. "Please end my horrible, worthless life. I no longer deserve to live..." Weak, the Tenken dropped his sword, slumping up against the cool, icy wall.

Kenshin's eyes seethed. There was nothing giving there.

"Kenshin!" Kaoru/Megumi was no longer struggling. Instead she stood there, her hand turned into fists, screaming at the top of her lungs. "KENSHIN!"

One of Kenshin's eyelids twitched. That voice...he knew that voice. A wave of sorrow lay barely dammed up in the back of his mind. Sorrow? For what? That voice, calling him...calling him out of this dark abyss in his soul.

"Ken...shin...." Exhausted, Kaoru/Megumi slumped to the floor, her eyes pleading, pleading for Kenshin to wake up.

"Kenshin! Pull your head out of your ass! What the hell do you think your doing?" Sanosuke pulled Kaoru/Megumi closer to him, fearful of both Kenshin and what he could do. "What the hell is wrong with you?!"

Another voice. Meaningless, said the Battousai.

"Please Kenshin, don't do it!" Yahiko hid behind Sano, as Misao and Aoshi attempted to call Kenshin back to them. All of them hollering, talking at the same time, and none of them making any sense. Yet all of them repeating one word, again and again. His name.

Kenshin...

Kenshin...

KENSHIN!

One voice stood out among the rest. The voice belonging to the woman he loved.

Wait. The voice, it was her, but yet not her. They had come here; they had come here on a mission, had they not? He was here to save her. He didn't need this young warrior, lying at his feet. What was he doing?

Kenshin averted his gaze to the ice-covered wall ahead of him, one edge of it stained with blood. In the reflection of the ice, he saw his eyes, glowing...seething in amber rage. The rage of a murderous demon, which had been set free with Kenshin's sorrow of not being able to protect, recover and help his friends. And Kaoru.

His own reflection scared him.

Kenshin bared his teeth as he winced. His whole body felt numb, felt drained for overexertion. He rocked back, using his katana for support, as the chorus of voices flooded his senses.

Soujirou lay on the floor, wracked with pain and quivering. He looked up into his attacker's face and saw a change there. As much as Soujirou pleaded that he be killed, that isn't what he wanted. He wanted to live. He wanted out. He just wanted to be in charge of his own damning life. He looked up once again into the eyes of the Battousai, getting a creeping feeling that the Battousai was already gone.

...beep...bep...beep...bep...beep...

Soujirou looked past Kenshin. A tingling sensation alerted him to the bigger picture. The machine was still working, still performing its evil, malicious duties. The Tenken knew that Kenshin could sense it to.

"That...noise...that...noise..." Kenshin grabbed at his head, felling overwhelmed by the aura of the machine as it worked. This action upset his balance, and he started to fall.

The blade of the Sakabatou slipped on the smooth, blood-slicked floor. Kenshin fell back hard, cracking his head on the floor. Too weak and struck to do much of anything, Kenshin felt himself sinking inward, into himself. He became vaguely aware of many hands grasping at him, shaking him, but only could speak one word.

"Kaoru..."

GCN: Author's words on this chapter: UG. SO hard to write. At some parts, I really hated it. It didn't get the exact feel I wanted it too, and then I ended up ending it with an awful cliffhanger. I will try to update within a month this time because the ending of this chapter SUCKED...but I ain't promising anything.

Hmmm, in other news, I'm so HAPPY! I beat Tales of Symphonia. I love that game!!!! Ah, the bliss. The advertisers were serious, you do fall in love with the characters, and the plot, and all the absolute coolness! Ah, I fell high. High on the coolness. It's like watching anime. That's why we watch anime. You fall in love with the characters, and the twists and story overwhelm you. Ahhhh...

Boy, am I an idiot today. I mean really, what the hell did I just say all that for??


	9. In whichthe plot thinkens again

GCN-anime-dragon: Yo.

Kagura: Yo yourself.

GCN: Wait. What? What the hell are you doing here? This is a Rurouni Kenshin fic. Shoo! Shoo! Git!

Kagura: Whatever.

GCN: :::sigh::: ANYway, I'm back! Finally, I know it's been far too long. I deserve to be shot. Or stoned. With ROCKS, mind you. Anyway, I'll cut down on the chatter and just update already. Sheesh. I could blame the delay on me watching too much anime. That would be my prime excuse. A friend loaned me "Gad Guard" and I was WAY too amused for my own good. That and my recent obsession with Gundam SEED…I proclaim my love for Yzak! :::Smacks Self Really, Really Hard::: Eeeee! MINE!

:Author is experiencing technical difficulties. Please stand by:

**WARPED REALITY: CHAPTER 9**

"_That...noise...that...noise..." Kenshin grabbed at his head, felling overwhelmed by the aura of the machine as it worked. This action upset his balance, and he started to fall._

_The blade of the Sakabatou slipped on the smooth, blood-slicked floor. Kenshin fell back hard, cracking his head on the floor. Too weak and struck to do much of anything, Kenshin felt himself sinking inward, into himself. He became vaguely aware of many hands grasping at him, shaking him, but only could speak one word._

"_Kaoru..."_

_----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

"Kenshin! Hey! Kenshin!" Yahiko grabbed the small rurouni by the arm, gently shaking him. Had Kenshin just passed out?

Sanosuke had a hold of Kenshin's shoulders. He looked none too happy. "It looks as though he finally snapped out of it. Damn it I didn't think he was actually gonna do it." He set Kenshin back down on the ground gently. "Now what?"

"I don't know? Can we carry him?" Kaoru/Megumi wondered.

Aoshi/Misao kneeled down, in the next motion scooping up Kenshin and throwing him over his/her shoulder. "Seems like it. Damn! He doesn't weigh anything at all!"

"The chibi-chan couldn't weigh that much anyway." Misao/Aoshi muttered, crossing her/his arms and looking down the tunnel. "The mission still stands. Kaoru needs us, and we've wasted too much time with this chicken shit anyway." He nodded toward Soujirou.

"What will we do with him anyway?" Sano asked, standing up.

Yahiko and Kaoru/Megumi walked over to were the Tenken still lay sprawled across the ice. His eyes were still open wide with pain and he was panting fiercely. With a high-pitched grown and cough of blood, he rolled over and was able to clutch his sword.

"Stay…stay back. Stay away from me!" Without any strength at all, Soujirou swung his sword around. Yahiko and Megumi stopped in their tracks. Didn't the Tenken WANT their help? They were not monsters after all, Yahiko was too caring for his own good and Megumi was a doctor. Maybe they could undo some of the damage that Kenshin had done.

"You…don't worry about me. You have to…stop him."

"We know. But stop trying to act all tough, young man. I can help you stop the bleeding at least. Maybe you would have enough life left to do something with it. Get out of this hellhole for example. Really be free." As usual, Megumi was blunt. But unlike normally, she was right on the dot. Without realizing it, she had struck a cord within the Tenken.

"Who are you?" he asked.

"Takani Megumi. The real one you were hired to capture. I hope you understand the seriousness of all this. We need to find Kaoru. And we need to find a way to get our bodies back to normal."

"And hopefully no waiting on that last part," Misao/Aoshi added.

Soujirou looked at each of them in turn with wonder. "Are all of you? Are all of you switches, glitches by the machine?"

"Not all of us." Sanosuke got up into his face. "Just the kitsune and Ice Boy here, and the girl. Also Kaoru, the one we're looking for ended up as the Kitsune." Soujirou looked around again, confused by Sano's odd way of wording things. "But more importantly, what's a glitch?"

A shoe hit him in the head, from Misao/Aoshi's direction. "How is THAT more important?!" 'she' squeaked.

"The machine…" Soujirou began.

"Is it a disturbance? Because that's what Kenshin sensed, and whatever Kenshin senses is always important, so that must be the source of the switches, ne?" Yahiko blurted out in a rush, not pausing to see if he was making any sense at all.

Soujirou replied, "Hai…the disturbance…is the source."

"We need to hurry!" Yahiko declared, taking off down the tunnel.

"Oi, chibi, wait up!" Sanosuke caught him by the back of his shirt. "We are in a hurry. But there is one thing that's been bugging the shit outta me since this whole thing started."

"What's that, Sano?" Aoshi/Misao asked. She adjusted Kenshin…he was making 'her' arm fall asleep.

"How is it frickin' possible?! People don't just switch bodies! It's impossible, physically impossible." Sanosuke kicked at the floor in frustration.

"I would have said the same thing too, years ago…" Soujirou attempted to sit up, was wracked with a fist of pain, and decided it was best to lie back down. "But then I saw it happen. Gold appear from rocks, or from air! People being transported with no meaning. The very chemical makeup of the atmosphere is…changing. How did you think that Kanryu was able to re-obtain his wealth?"

"He…" Kaoru/Megumi searched for the words.

"He created it," Soujirou stated, spitting out blood. "With that machine…with alchemy."

**-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

GCN: Ahhh! Okay, Okay! I get it! Don't kill me! Honestly, I had this all thought out BEFORE I saw Fullmetal Alchemist. (Speaking of which, that's on tonight. Too bad me no have cable.) I'll admit, the word "alchemy" wasn't in my vocabulary, but the basic jest of Kanryu changing rocks and people into gold and power WAS the idea. So don't get odd on me…especially you, Sano99, or if you ever actually read this, Kenshin's Chick. Reading on….:::slaps self::: For those of you who haven't had the joy of watching Fullmetal and might not know what alchemy is: it's just the basis of a science used in transforming one object into another. There are all these laws and principals and other crap, but Kanryu is ignoring those laws anyway, so I'll leave it at that!)

**--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- **

The weary band continued further into the tunnel. Kenshin muttered a few random syllables in his slumber, but never fully regained consciousness. He was juggled awkwardly between Sano and Aoshi/Misao, his bloody sakabatou still held in a death grip in his little hand. Yahiko marched up front, with Kaoru/Megumi and a pissed-off looking Misao/Aoshi in the back.

The ice on the walls began to shrink as the temperature rose, the walls beginning to show their stone skin. The floor seized to be a bumpy, gravel-ridden source and became smooth and polished, with tile patters so elaborate and beautiful, Sanosuke was sure they couldn't have been made with human hands.

And so in this manner, they pushed further in…

**---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

Megumi/Kaoru remained motionless on the floor, her hair a wild mess and her clothing soiled with grit and blood. Kanryu towered over her, breathing heavily. Once he was sure that the girl was indeed either dead or unconscious, he pushed up his rectangular glasses.

"Well, that's certainly one thing out of the way." He hissed, turning back towards his machine. He chuckled, rubbing his hands together maliciously. "Now then, my precious, what riches do this one need next? Gold? Silver? All the wealth of every Western land?"

The machine hummed thoughtfully, beeping in its own possessed manner. "I could have it all!"

The psychotic crime lord was too busying rolling in his greed that he didn't notice that a group of newcomers had flooded into the opening of his room. They continued to remain an illusive presence until the 'shink!' of unsheathing swords alerted him.

"Ho ho ho, what's this?" he mused.

Kenshin's eyes were fluttering, but he didn't register the situation. Sano set him down, as Aoshi/Misao toyed dangerously with Aoshi's twin kodachi. 'Oh the havoc I could wreck,' she chuckled to herself.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing! Those aren't toys, y'know!" Misao/Aoshi interjected squeakily. He missed his swords…he didn't have any clue how to work with the knives and disks that Misao used as her shinobi weapons.

"What? I can use these! Just watch me!" Aoshi/Misao scoffed, pretending hurt. Sano grunted and looked at Kanryu, his fists ready for the using.

Unable to let the argument settle at that, Misao/Aoshi prodded, "So, what's your plan to use them for?"

Laughing manically, Misao chuckled, "Cut off his widdle head…" Aoshi just groaned, deciding to ignore her and pay the much-needed attention to their enemy.

Yahiko, subtle as always, rushed in front of the others, holing both of his fists up in a threatening matter, shouting, "Alright you scumbag, we're here for Kaoru, and your evil scheme ends here." (The others all sighed exasperatedly.)

"Ada? You think so? We'll just see about that, little child." Kanryu brushed his hand up against the machine.

Before Yahiko could interject with a shout of "Don't call me little!!" The machine washed the room with an unearthly red light; buzzing and frantically whirring it's gears. From the panel on the front, where Kanryu's hands had touched it, to probes began to stick out.

The probes lept from the machine into Kanryu's waiting hands. To the disbelief and awe of the others, they had become to gleaming halberds right in front of their eyes. Kanryu held them out in front of himself, pausing only a moment before slashing Yahiko (who was stupidly the closed) right across the chest.

"Yahiko!" a chorus of voices cried.

"Ah!" the boy squeaked before he hit the ground hard beside Megumi/Kaoru. The blades were real! That evil bastard had created real weapons in less then a second. What other deadly secrets did that monstrous machine hold? As the boy whirled around frantically, facing his enemy, as another thought passed through his mind: He must protect Kaoru…if she was even still alive….

"Daijoka, Yahiko?!" Kaoru/Megumi hollered over the ensuing insanity. Tran: "Are you ok?"

"You're gonna pay, you ass!" Sanosuke charged forward, drawing back his fists for a major two-on-one punch. Kanryu smirked, raising the halberds to guard himself. Misao/Aoshi came out of nowhere, flipping over the psycho bad guy to attack him from behind.

"Give me back my body!" the little ninja was surprised indeed when Kanryu took his other weapon and slashed at him. The golden blade missed by barely an inch. Since when did the crime lord have such skill? It wasn't possible! Could it be another gift from the cursed machine??

Aoshi/Misao ran forward, taking advantage of Kanryu's distracted state. The kodachi held forward, 'he' charged strait for the bastard's belly.

Sure that she had succeeded, Misao began doing a mental happy dance. Yet… it was sadly short lived. A breath before the blade would skewer him, Kanryu jerked his halberd to the left, throwing an off-balance Sano into his friend.

"HO HO HO HO!!" More evil laughter. What the hell was up with this?!?! Less than a minute into the fight, and already everyone's first attacks had been parried or otherwise rendered useless. What were they going to do…?

**------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

GCN: Two things to know: 1.) Yes, everyone did seem more crazy than usual, I give it that. It was one of those days! 2.) A halberd is like that thing Seung Mina uses in Soul Calibur II, specifically the Cousk (sp?), the one with red handle and gold tip, with the ability to guard-break. There was a bunch of useless info, I know.

That's that. GEEZ it was a LONG time before I updated, and this was a little short, and hai, I do deserve your annoyance. Throw candy at me. It's harder than vegetables and tastes so much better. Though, I do love my veggies. Like cooked carrots and peas and broccoli and beans and corn and …

ACK!

I'll stop these Author's notes before I loose my mind! (Would it help you to know that I'm sitting here wearinga headband and big poofy kimono looking shirt, having had nothing to eat today but Reese's Swoops, Mt. Dew and Tomato soup? Probably not.)

I'll be seein' you on the other side! Ja ne!

--- GCN-anime-dragon


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